This is going to long to give some background context. I have a male friend who I've known for several years. A couple of years ago we were both single at the same time and things got a bit flirty whenever we met. I developed a crush on him and thought that we might be heading to more than friends but I never said or did anything because in my heart I knew that we would make an awful couple. He never said or did anything either, and then suddenly started to distance himself from me, be unavailable to meet up etc, which I later found out coincided with him meeting a woman that he fancied and then started to date. We stayed casual friends, talking occasionally but were noticeably not as close as we had been, not unexpected given he was in a new relationship.
End of last year, friend's girlfriend broke up with him, which he took badly, and then shortly afterwards one of his DPs died suddenly. We spent a lot of time together and I felt like I was providing him with some emotional support in a difficult time. Then suddenly at end of Jan he went a bit cold on me, too busy to meet up, or we would make plans and he would cancel. At first I thought it was just life, and then after about a month I wondered if I should be taking some sort of hint. Eventually I asked if he was avoiding me and he said no, just life, but I still had to really push him to meet up, and I only did that because I could see that with the coronavirus situation if we didn't get together it might be months before we could again.
We met up at last weekend, and he seemed pretty distant compared to a couple of months ago. But there didn't seem to be a new woman in the picture or any other reason. I decided that I would leave it to him to contact me again, because things felt a bit one sided. I haven't heard from him since, although it has only been a week.
Now on to my problem. I want him to want me, both as a friend and possibly something more, even though I definitely no longer fancy him. I feel like i need the ego boost of him really valuing me as a friend and I feel a bit gutted that he doesnt seem to. I realise that this is really unhealthy and there is something psychological going on with me that I need to get to the bottom of. I am even jealous of other people that he spends time with because he didn't make me his priority. Anyway can anyone offer insight into why I feel this way or what I should do to let this go and develop more healthy thought patterns. In normal times I would probably try to spend as much time as possible with other friends or keeping busy with other stuff but that is a bit hard at the moment.