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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Apologising

12 replies

Alwayslonging · 14/03/2020 18:52

After an argument, not necessarily a big one do you or your other half apologise or just carry on as though nothing happened?

OP posts:
TorkTorkBam · 14/03/2020 19:07

Depends if there is something to apologise for. We don't tend to argue in ways that leave us needing to apologise.

BillyN0Mates · 14/03/2020 19:08

Depends. I think it's good to acknowledge fault if I've been unreasonable.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 14/03/2020 19:12

Well the one we are having right now will probably end in me apologising to his family for murdering him

Heartburn888 · 14/03/2020 20:14

If it’s a disagreement then no apology is given by either side and we carry on as normal

If it’s more serious I.e accusing someone of doing/not doing something (for an example) then an apology is expected and given.

OhNoNoNoNotThatOne · 14/03/2020 20:18

It depends on what the argument is about. If it's a disagreement, no because you're sharing opinions and debating why the other is wrong (Well that's what we tend to do)

If it's accusations or it gets personal and insults are thrown about, then yes we do apologise (this has only happened once)

For the most part though, no because there's not usually anything to say sorry for. We're more likely to apologise if we get in eachothers way while in the kitchen or something.

Alwayslonging · 14/03/2020 20:52

It's more it ended by him telling me to sod off. He hadn't long got up for work (works nights) and was in a just got up grump.
I sometimes do feel he should apologise but he just starts talking like nothing has happened. I just wasn't sure if that's what people do and it was me expecting too much.

OP posts:
CluelessAboutClothes · 14/03/2020 20:59

Usually we apologise but I do find it hard to move on from it so if there was the thought of some romance later that day or evening I am not able to forget the fallout and it puts me off resulting in mostly a definite no romance kind of evening.

TorkTorkBam · 14/03/2020 22:16

How often is he rude to you?

BillyN0Mates · 14/03/2020 23:01

That doesn't sound like an argument though op.

Alwayslonging · 14/03/2020 23:36

There was a bit of an argument that ended with him telling me to sod off. I felt he should have apologised for saying that to me.

OP posts:
TorkTorkBam · 14/03/2020 23:42

An apology is meaningless if it is for something that happens often. It means the person is not actually sorry. Is this a one off? Is he sorry?

NoMoreDickheads · 14/03/2020 23:47

I think he should apologize for that as it's definitely not ok.

I would always apologise, but that's my personality. Some people find it harder, ( rolls eyes ) maybe more so men than women?

I see an inability/reluctance to apologize as a bit of a character flaw.

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