DH runs his own business and in the last few months things have been tough. I can tell that he’s quite stressed out about this and is working extra hard to try and make the best of things. I want to support him but whenever I speak to him about work and ask how it’s going, he snaps and shouts and says he doesn’t want to talk about it. He says that when I ask how things are, it makes him feel more under pressure and that he’d rather I just didn’t ask as he prefers to deal with it internally.
The thing is, I just can’t bear knowing that he’s going through this stress on his own with no one to talk to. I want him to know that I’m there for him to vent or share his concerns with, because I worry about him and I love him.
There is another side to this, which is that I’m not the strongest of people emotionally and tend to get very anxious and depressed at times. In the past I’ve relied a lot on DH for mental support and haven’t been the easiest of people to live with in that respect. I know it’s selfish of me and I haven’t been the best wife. Perhaps he feels he can’t share his worries with me for that reason?
We also have our first baby on the way, which we’re very excited about but it’s probably adding to the pressure. I know DH feels he needs to provide for us, as do I (I work too, but we’d struggle if one of us lost our salary).
Because of DH’s snappiness and short temper, I’ve been feeling increasingly distant from him - we’re less affectionate than we used to be and are less close physically, which makes me feel quite lonely at times. Sometimes I wonder if we’ll ever be happy again, because a lot of the time it feels like we’re on totally different wavelengths.
Does anyone have any advice?