Who confirms the date?

[SunshineOverStress]

Sooo, I met a guy on a night out a few weeks ago, I was busy the following weekends but we started messaging again and he said he’d like to see me, I said I’m free this Saturday..

We last spoke all over the weekend and Monday night and in the last messages I said I’m working during the day Saturday but should be ready to meet by 9.. he said that’s fine let him know when I’m ready, and I said we need to think of where to meet because I’m useless at decisions, and he said we’ve got plenty of time to think and said goodnight to each other.

We haven’t spoken since, he hasn’t messaged me and I haven’t messaged him, he’s constantly online on WhatsApp so I feel like if he wanted to message me he would have?

So what do I do, as we haven’t actually set a meeting point yet. Am I right in thinking it should be him contacting me to confirm things if he’s interested? How long do I leave it until I assume it’s not happening?!

He’s not from London he’s South American I don’t know if this makes any difference but he doesn’t know many places to go etc but still?!

Just ask him if he is still up for meeting .

Do you want to meet him?

If you do, message him "do you still want to meet tomorrow? I can do 9pm at X".

If you don't want to meet, then leave it.

Get in touch with him. He's probably thinking the same as you.

Maybe just say if you're not busy this Sat would you like to meet me at X place about half 9? Let me know what you think

Or ... he is treating you as one amongst many options.

Knowing what I know now, I would just leave him be. If he wants a date with me, he needs as a minimum agree a place and time. I quite enjoy organising so used to fall into the trap of doing the organising.

Now, I would let him do some.

True FinallyHere , if he was interested he would be contacting you .
In retrospect just bin .

I'd give him a (one) chance, contact him and ask if he still wants to meet up as you would like to firm up the arrangements. He might not be the chatty/take the initiative type at first or may be assuming the same of you that you aren't bothered. Just message and see where it leads. If he seems non-committal to meet, then bin him.

Just message and ask. You have nothing to lose. If he says no then at least you know where you stand. Otherwise you will be holding off making other plans in case he does get in touch. Message him now and give him until the end of this evening to respond.

He's a time-waster. He had a chance to lock in time and place and he deliberately shut it down. He probably has no intention of meeting.

I'd assume there is no date. If he did text about it at this stage, I would say 'sorry, I arranged something else on Thursday, assumed you weren't up for it.' And it would have been the truth. Never leave your precious Saturday nights open to a last minute arrangement

We teach others how to treat us. Do not teach anyone that they can confirm a Saturday night date later than Thursday.

@ChristmasFluff

You’re so right! However i already messaged!

I put... tomorrow? 🍸😏 and he replied saying my girl 😘 where will we meet? So I suggested a place in London between both of us and he confirmed a time and that and I said we will keep each other updated and leave at a similar time etc.

Maybe he was waiting for me I’m not sure?
But if there’s ever a next time he can confirm!

🤙🏻

So I went on my date, all went really well, ended up staying over at his and he was a proper gentleman, said he hopes to see me again etc!

Planned to see him this Friday, I asked where we will go, he replied and also said that he’s tired so will probably want to sleep early! I asked if he wanted to leave it if he’s tired and he said it’s up to me as he knows I have to travel a bit and he’s a gentleman so I replied ok let’s leave it then with a kiss face.

He then responds with let me know if there’s any chance of meeting this weekend... what the hell? That was his chance! I had already told him Friday was the only day I’m free to meet.

So anyway, I just haven’t replied and he hasn’t made any more effort to contact me. Have I done the right thing by not replying? I feel like if someone really wanted to see you they wouldn’t even mention that they are tired!

He's a bit of a wet dish rag, isn't he?

I could not be arsed with that.