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Original poster

Dp being a new age guru

16 replies

beakerbabe72 · 04/03/2020 09:00

I am slitting from Dp for other reasons. I was just wondering if anyone would think it was unreasonable behaviour if your partner became a new age guru? Started getting into meditation and making lots of female and male friends on line and in real life. Sending messages with kisses. Going to meetings. Going for lunch with other said women without mentioning it. Telling them they’ve miss them want to catch up for lunch xx. Going on holiday on their own. I’m not upset because we are not in any case getting on. I was just thinking this is not how you would’ve behave if you were family focused?

OP posts:
TigerDater · 04/03/2020 09:04

What does it matter if you’re splitting anyway? Or are you asking re the divorce petition?

Original poster
beakerbabe72 · 04/03/2020 09:07

No we are not married. Maybe it doesn’t matter I just thought it was a bit rubbish and was interested if other people would agree. I don’t say anything or make it a issue.

OP posts:
amiapropermum · 04/03/2020 09:13

I would see it as a sign that your lives are going in different directions and that your relationship (and family?) wasn't a priority anymore. Development of new interests is great but something all encompassing changes things

Onemansoapopera · 04/03/2020 09:18

I would see it as a sign that splitting up is the right decision because everyone I've known who has embraced 'being a new age guru' seems to become extremely zealous about it and about expressing their new found 'spirituality' (shagging about)

ComtesseDeSpair · 04/03/2020 09:21

If your relationship isn’t going well and you’re on the road to separation then it sounds like he’s taking the first steps towards his “new life” and also trying to process it and cope with how he feels about it all - taking up new hobbies and particularly getting into health and wellbeing and mindfulness stuff has been pretty common amongst many of my friends when their relationships have broken or been breaking down, albeit more common among the women.

If he’s neglecting time with the DC to follow all this then yes, he’s being unreasonable. If it just bothers you because he’s meeting new people and particularly other women then I think you’re being unreasonable, you can’t police his relationships or friendships when you’re not a couple.

ComtesseDeSpair · 04/03/2020 09:24

It also sounds like you need to start moving on yourself. When it’s his time with the DC that’s your time to take up your own hobbies and interests rather than focus on how unfair or rubbish it is that he’s doing so.

Original poster
beakerbabe72 · 04/03/2020 09:48

We have 2 dc. I prioritise all my cash energy into them ( work to support them) while he is more interested in finding himself

OP posts:
ComtesseDeSpair · 04/03/2020 10:11

Then your priority should be formalising arrangements for child maintenance and the time he has the children. He doesn’t get to just waft off into his own new life without supporting or spending time with his children. He can do whatever he wants with whoever he wants outside of that agreed time so don’t get hung up on that, but pin him down over child arrangements and finances. Go through the CMS and get a court order if necessary.

NoMoreDickheads · 04/03/2020 10:23

It was wrong of him to meet other women without telling you- that sounds suspicious or that he wanted it to lead to something.

We have 2 dc. I prioritise all my cash energy into them ( work to support them) while he is more interested in finding himself

Sounds self-absorbed, and annoying.

OhCaptain · 04/03/2020 10:25

He just sounds like a knob. Find yourself all you want, but pay the rent on your kids' house first.

You're well shot!

RantyAnty · 04/03/2020 10:28

Being a woke new age sjw type is a way for guys to get laid.

I'd just make sure you get your fair share in the split and him ordered to pay maintenance before he swans off into the ethereal world.

Try to tell yourself not to think about what he's doing or not doing. It's hard at first but necessary.

Patroclus · 04/03/2020 14:23

Rap him in his yoga mat and throw him out. The bin men do special collections for men like this.

Gutterton · 04/03/2020 14:36

He sounds like a sleaze and is just using wellness/new age to target women.

In the old days these types used to turn up to salsa classes etc.

So it could have been any new activity.

I trust that his new “emotional insight” has translated to improved / enlightened parenting of your DCs and has not just got stuck in his cock?

No? Thought not.

wondertime · 04/03/2020 14:44

Gutterton ^ ha ha spot on!

user1465335180 · 04/03/2020 15:06

Oh blimey Op, another man having a midlife crisis. Get rid

Sushiroller · 04/03/2020 15:12

No it is not. Your poor children.

He sounds like a Massive sleaze ball pretending to have a Midlife crisis...

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