Any ladies find true love and marriage in their 30s?

[Salemss1]

I’m 30, nearly 31, and my love life has been pretty rocky. My college love/soulmate unexpectedly passed away when I was 23 after 4 years together. A few months after he died, I fell in love again. My ex husband we moved in, got engaged and married. We've since separated, fairly amicably, in late 2019.

Since then, I am mostly just concentrating on living my best life and having fun. I’ve started dating again and am getting discouraged that I’m 30 and haven’t yet found the right guy. I recognize I have time and don’t need a man to be happy but I would eventually like to find someone. Plenty of my friends are still single but it is hard watching so many people around me be in happy, healthy relationships. I am overall pretty relaxed about my single-ness but I'd like it to happen soon than later.

Anyone been in my boat? What’s your story?

I also would love to talk one on one if anyone would be willing

I was married to a lovely man, just not the right man for me, through my 20s and early 30s. We had a son (now 17). We divorced when he was 2 and i was 32. I expected to be single for a long time, did a bit of dating (OLD was in its infancy then, only DirectDating.com exsisted). It was all a bit crap.

Went to a mutual friend's house warming party and met a man, an old friend of hers. It was almost Love At First Sight! I was 33. We have been together 15 years this year and have a blended family of 3 teenage boys.

We are still very much in love. Don't despair, there's ages yet!

You've got absolutely ages yes.

My story is that I had partners, but never the right one to marry and I ended the relationships. The last one was 5 yrs, taking me to about 42 or so.

You're over ten years younger huh.

Anyway I wanted to meet someone new. A friend got me into chanting for outcomes, so I chanted at lunchtime in a local churchyard on a bench for a partner I'd be happy with who I loved and loved me. Colleagues then recommended that I go online and within weeks I met an amazing man. He replied regularly, he was straight up, he wanted to meet soon, he was single and flirty.

I put on a long black Ghost dress and meet him in a local pretty pub. Two years later we are engaged and live together and he's just so yummy and lovely. Nothing worries me about the relationship, he is solid, sweet, generous, fun, open minded and I adore him.

My advice to you, at ten years younger than me, is to call for what you want. The whole package, no compromise. And then wait. In the meantime, develop your own life, your career, everything. Live fully in the trusted knowledge that someone else WILL come along xxx

yep, with three children, crazy ex, no money, huge debts and a hefty mortgage.

left my husband and we got together 6 weeks later. best man ever!

Yes and Yes! And you will too!

I married my high school sweetheart, which I've since realized was a mistake but there's no going back in time. We divorced when we were 31.

Later that year, I met the love of my life, who is now my DH. He was in the process of getting divorced at the time too and the last thing either of us were looking for was a serious relationship. But we fell in love and now 14 years later, we have our sweet little boy and are celebrating our 10 year wedding anniversary next month!

I agree with something2say - be very clear in your mind on exactly what you want in a partner and you will manifest it.

Also agreeing with very clear in your mind on exactly what you want in a partner and you will manifest it.

I too married my sweetheart and ended up separating at 30 and then divorcing. After I met my current partner I found a forgotten about note that I had written of all of the qualities I wanted in someone: respect, consideration etc. basic stuff really but the most important. As I looked down the list I realised that he ticked every box.

Met at 37, married at 38, pregnant at 39!

Yes - my first marriage

Met first husband when I was 18, we split up when I was 34. At nearly 36 years old current Mr Onalake walked into work on his first day and I knew I would fall in love with him. We moved in together 5 months after first meeting. That was 17 years ago now.

We have had some amazingly crap stuff thrown at us over the years, but we have always had each other's backs.

You are still young yet op!

30s is the new 20s! Things also speed up when you get older in my experience. I got together with an old friend in my late 30s and we settled down and had a child remarkably quickly. I found as I got older I knew what I wanted and I was a bit more financially secure so there was less stress on the relationship in a way.

Yes. I was with XH for over a decade - wasted my entire 20s with him. Enjoyed being on my own for 30-32 ish then met DH. We've been married for a few years now and it's great. I know what I will put up with and made sure DH knew my Ts&Cs as it were! Same for him. He'd been single a long time and was mid-late 30s when we married. Both of us knew very early on that we'd each made a friend for life, as well as a life partner.

I got married at 25, left him at 31. He was an abusive bastard, a gambling addict who stole from me to fund his addiction, and he lived (slept, ate his meals etc) in a separate room for the last two years of our marriage.

That same year I left him I met a wonderful man online. After a couple of months of chatting via email and Skype we finally met in person and we both knew that was it. We have been together for six years now. Married since last year and now have a baby on the way!

Yep, with my ex from 16 to 29. Spent a few years making up for lost time dating wise, lots of fun and a few times thought I’d found something long term but it never worked out. Met DH at 36, moved in together a year later, I’m 40 now, we got married last year and I’m now pregnant.

It sounds like youve been through the mill a bit, honestly I’d say make the most of some time to focus on yourself and have some fun/travel/ do stuff that makes you happy. I love my DH and our life, but I do miss my own place sometimes, my girly holidays (they’ve become weekends now rather than 2-3 weeks, and when baby arrives there probably won’t be many of those either), the sense of only ever having to please myself. I wouldn’t want to be without DH now, but I’m so glad I had those times.

I spent years in crappy relationships, a decade over 2 exDP's.
Split with the last exDP and met someone absolutely, fantastically wonderful a few months after on OLD.
I think in your 30s you both know what you do/don't want and have the life experiences to know the signs and red flags to show something is wrong so are able to make your excuses and end it.
I went on a few dates with other people before meeting Mr. ladyface, but they weren't right, I felt like Goldilocks at one point!
You can find love in your 30s and to be honest it's probably going to be actual love, true acceptance of the other person, and genuinely valuing their presence in you life and vice versa.

My sister broke up with the guy she'd been with since university not long before her 30th birthday... but about two years later she met the guy she has now been married to for 10 years, so yes it happens. And TBH I think the guy she married is a much nicer and more straighforward person than her ex.

Im 33,
In my 2nd long term relationship.
First ended in divorce.

There is always hope. My partner is 54 and I am his first long term relationship.

I met DH when we were both 35. Had DS at 38. Been together 13 years.

I met DP in my mid 30's having spent my later 20's and early 30's single.

I did have to move to do it! All my friends were setting down and having kids and I wasn't meeting new people - my social life was shrinking. Tried internet dating a few times but it wasn't my thing. An opportunity came up in another city and that mind set of making a change, being out on a limb and having to build a new social life led me to taking chances I had got out of the habit of doing and I met my DP.

10 years down the line very happy but still in the new city and wish I could have done it in my hometown with my old friends and family around!

I was 33 and had given up. I'm now 36 and very happily married.

Yep, met him at 35. Twenty years and 2 kids later he has just brought me cup of tea in bed.

I met DH at 34.

Yes met my soon to be husband at 36, moved in at 37, we had our son at 38 and will marry in the next 6 weeks.

And forgot to add that included leaving my first husband at 35 after a 8 year relationship