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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

When you are scared

16 replies

Catloveisreal · 23/02/2020 14:53

Husband is an emotional abuser and a neglectful father who we now can confirm has another woman. He has a very nasty side and me and my teens are feeling anxious. He has a gun license and guns in a cabinet. He has threatened us though not specifically. Just saying that we don't know what he's capable of.

OP posts:

loveyoutothemoon · 23/02/2020 15:14

GET OUT OF THERE FAST! (But safely). When he's not around, grab your essentials and stay with a friend or family. You are seriously at risk.

Bookworm83 · 23/02/2020 15:36

Please tell the police, they will take his guns away. If you say he's a domestic abuser and has threatened you they will take it seriously.

Please don't wait.

Good luck x

Singlenotsingle · 23/02/2020 15:39

Agree with pp's. This is a dangerous situation, and you don't want to take a risk.

Original poster

Catloveisreal · 23/02/2020 17:41

Neighbour wants me to go to police. He's wants to take me after hearing the story.

OP posts:

Raera · 23/02/2020 17:47

Please go with your neighbour and take the teens with you.
NOW

Renarde19 · 23/02/2020 17:52

OP This is an area I know quite a lot about as my F held a license and guns in the house.

The Police need to be called NOW! As your address will be tagged under the license, it's 999. Explain the threats he is making. This is THAT serious.

People bandy around the term 'psychopath' like confetti but this is one post that chills me to the core.

I also echo getting out with the children. You have no idea if he has kept ammunition. (That is way beyond the terms of the license BTW, all ammo needs to be kept at licensed gun clubs.)

notapizzaeater · 23/02/2020 18:14

The police will take this seriously- you need to keep safe

Raera · 23/02/2020 18:17

Are you and your DC safe OP?

RedIsWhereItsAt · 23/02/2020 18:31

Did you post about this a couple of weeks ago?

Original poster

Catloveisreal · 23/02/2020 18:45

OK at present. We have lived like this for a long time. The threatening took place last week to my eldest who is away now for a few days. He threatened her because he wanted a haircut and when told yes but later he told her not to cross him and that she didn't know what he is capable of. She cut the hair. I am working hard on ducks and have a place of safety organised very close by. I am going to police but can't wind him up til I have more evidence. I am keeping records now. Lots of friends know.

OP posts:

Renarde19 · 23/02/2020 18:51

No OP. Dead wrong. You have evidence, yours and your children's statements.

What you do is invent a pretence for him to leave the house. Buy something etc. The minute he has gone, you lock the doors.

Call police on 999 and explain there are guns in the house, you do not know if there is ammo. That he has been threatening you.

Trust me, you will get an immediate response on this.

Do it. Do it now before you become a statistic.

No working on ducks. No gathering evidence,

You have a responsibility.

Original poster

Catloveisreal · 23/02/2020 18:52

Rediswhereitsat no I posted the other day asking about exclusion orders as solicitor suggested that as a way forward

OP posts:

TorkTorkBam · 23/02/2020 18:54

Police will take it very very seriously. You have nothing to lose by phoning them.

Babooshkar · 23/02/2020 18:58

You need to take action NOW. There are guns and there could be ammunition. This is not worth the risk.

Runningonempty2020 · 23/02/2020 19:01

Get out immediately. I'm a pathologist and I see far too many women murdered by their partners.

Opaljewel · 24/02/2020 18:58

Come on this is your lives we are talking about and your children's lives. There is no better time than now.
Don't think he won't really do it because he could. My English friend was nearly murdered by her husband in America December. Somehow she survived. Shot in the head and spine. She is still in hospital getting rehab. I doubt she thought he would either!

Please just go. Don't worry about assets. Go see the police and get their advice asap.

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