Sexting

[Whatdopeopledotoday]

Hope it’s okay to have this here on the relationships board - it’s not actually about sex, but about sexting.

Bluntly put, does everyone sext “nowadays” and are you strange if you don’t?

I am out of a very long marriage and dated someone for a bit recently (it came to nothing). However when he told me about the passionate messaging relationships he had had with other people he dated it made me realise he probably thought I was odd for never doing it. Well maybe not since that kind of connection never took off between us, but even if it had, sexting is probably the last thing that it would occur to me to do. I would feel ridiculous doing it as well, and exh and I never did it.

Is this unusual? Does it make me a prude? Am questioning a lot of things following the dating. My date clearly thought I didn’t fancy him when I kind of did, but was reserved and shy.

Nah it's grim. You either get turned on by it or you don't. I've done it and I was pretending, eventually it made me view the person as creepy lol. It just made me feel a bit shit.
As with anything sexual if you don't fancy it, don't do it. Nothing to be ashamed of, probably just not the right guy

I don't like it - it's a turn off for me.

Nah it's not for me either.

Surely it depends on the person, different strokes for different folks. I've definitely done it IN long term relationships but haven't with a random person/new partner/someone I was casually dating- and don't think I'd want to as it seems seedy and I'd rather get to know them but as part of an existing sex life it can be really fun.

Wouldn't send photos though, no matter who to.

As with all things sex, if you don't want to do it, don't, if that's not ok then the person isn't for you. How 'normal' or 'usual' something is is absolutely not how one should judge what they do in bed. It only matters what you are comfortable with.

Okay well that’s good .

Thanks.

The thought of it makes me cringe, and I wouldn’t interpret the absence of it as meaning a woman had no interest in me.

Sorry, missed your post @dontgobaconmyheart - thanks.

Well I am not necessarily thinking that this is what my date thought @HairyArsedMan - I just guess I realised he had been used to other things with other people.

Ah fair enough, if it helps, it’s never come into the conversation in my online dating experience over the past few years. Obviously some people like it and if they can enjoy it together, good for them, but you needn’t see yourself as an outlier.

Complete and utter turn off for me. Makes me cringe.
I do quite enjoy bit mild double entendre though.

Bit did seem a thing when i was doing old and I was surprised how many women sounded me out about it as I always assumed it was a male thing

you needn’t see yourself as an outlier. Yes it does help - thank you.

I have felt forced into it in the past and felt uncomfortable. I think it can be a way of making someone push their boundaries in a way which isn’t loving.

I would say any guy who starts talking about what he does with other women is a bit of a creep and pushing boundaries. Like if someone told me ‘lots of women really enjoy anal sex / bdsm / sex toys’ to make you feel insecure for not doing an activity. Well swerved op.

Never put anything 'out there' that you wouldn't be happy with your grandmother seeing; it could so easily come back to bite you.

I do quite enjoy bit mild double entendre though. - all that “said the actress to the bishop” stuff - fnarr fnarr - sorry, maybe that’s not what you meant @otterhound!

Never put anything 'out there' that you wouldn't be happy with your grandmother seeing - yeah good point.

I would say any guy who starts talking about what he does with other women is a bit of a creep - no he was nice. At that point we were kind of friend-zoned in any case, and he was talking about past experiences. It did make me wonder about myself however and now straight laced I might be. Am relieved to hear that I am not, particularly.

I have felt forced into it in the past and felt uncomfortable. -

how not now