A colleague of mine who I got on with really well was being emotionally bullied be her partner. She had been moaning and complaining about it her months, she used to come into work exhausted and a total wreck. Her partner was going out drinking twice a week and emotionally abusing her when he came home. He was a bad father and never around. They went to counselling and in the last session said that the relationship was over, he was looking for a new place to live and talking about online dating - the only reason he didn't move out was because he couldn't afford to pay their mortgage and rent somewhere else.
I was also going through a tough time with worries about my sons mental health, she and I supported each other through our mutual difficulties. She was desperate to leave her partner and worried about how she could keep the house so I offered to buy him out of it and take a share of the house. I spent a lot of money on solicitors fees and even paid for her to have her own legal advice to ensure she independently advised and happy with the situation. We had discussed started a business together and I even met her parents (she is 20 years younger than me). I helped her with some of her studies, she was desperate to get a pay rise to be more financially independent. We would have lunch together once a week, we used to message and speak several times a day. I was totally honest with her and told her about the substance abuse issues I had 15 years ago (I have been clean since) and some of the relationship issues I had in the past. I was quite optimistic that our relationship could turn romantic and thought the signs were good, despite my age I am in great condition - she had told me before that I am more attractive than her partner.
Her partner started a temporary role 6 months ago working away part of the week which we both thought was the end of their relationship, and a prelude to him moving out. Then he sent bunches of roses and flowers to her at work, one was so big she could barely carry it - she said she hated having them from him. Apparently he stopped drinking and started being really nice, though she didn't trust him. Since then she has been away on holiday with him. While they were away he sent me messages which revealed she has told him everything that I told her about the substance abuse issues and called me a pervert - that really made me feel like she had broken some of our trust.
I have now discovered that they are looking to move house and buy somewhere which requires total renovation, new roof, new wiring, no central heating, everything doing to it. I don't think they have rekindled their romance but I don't understand how someone who was such a wreck before as result of his abuse and so certain she was going to leave has decided to give up her studies, walk away from the house she told me she loved and buy a total shack with the guy she said was abusing her.
Whilst I admit being a little hurt personally, I am concerned for her.