Seeing/dating/boyfriend/partner

[caulkheaded]

Friend 1: you’re boyfriend/girlfriend as soon as you’ve kissed

Friend 2: you’re dating for a few weeks, then seeing each other. BF/GF only after sex

Friend 3: Boyfriend/Girlfriend after first few dates, partner after a couple of months.

What do you think - do you have “rules” on what to say or is it all fluid?

There is only one rule.

There are no rules. Because, oddly enough, as your friends have proved, we're all different.

Although Friend 1 sounds like they're around eight years old when you have that primary school boyfriend/girlfriend thing.

That’s what I thought! But then began to over think it and doubted myself!

I would consider a partner to be someone I share finances and bills with.

I know it gets tricky when you are a little older. It is kinda weird to call someone your boyfriend or girlfriend, when you are on the older side.. so maybe in these cases, a partner could be someone you date. As if you are looking for a life companion in older years, but don't want to share finances with them as you have a family to think of.

In general I would think the order is;
-You are seeing someone if you are casually dating them
-you are dating someone if you are only dating them, and not seeing other people, but are not ready to commit fully
-you are bf/gf when you have "the talk"
-you are partners if you move in together, and therefore share finances / have a baby
-you are engaged if you are discussing wedding dates
-you are married when you sign on the dotted line

I always cringe when I read / hear people refer to their "partner, whom I've been with 3 months". No, just no! but each to their own!

Gosh if kissing someone made them your boyfriend I have had a LOT of boyfriends, some of which I don't think I ever bothered finding out the name of

I've got a boyfriend and I'm in my late 30s, I'm not sure I could bring myself to introduce him to people or refer to him as my "partner" it makes me feel old (despite having been married), I'm not sure why!?

I don’t recall ever using “seeing someone” when I was single! That sounds very casual.
Dating/boyfriend/girlfriend I’d lump together. You go out for a meal/cinema/day out/whatever and either return to your own homes or both go back to one.
I wouldn’t consider partners until you’re living together, sharing a home, bills etc.

I too see lots of relatively short relationships (a few weeks/months with no residential status) referring to each other as ‘my partner’ and cringe.

I've kissed the man I'm in love with scores of times. We've been out on lots of dates. There is NO way we're boyfriend and girlfriend. That's a commitment that you both agree to, not something that follows a set of rules.

Doesn't it depend on how you both feel about each other? I've never called someone my boyfriend before the "where is this heading chat" personally.

I don't agree with any of your friends! I'm guessing they're all very young by the sounds of it.

We kissed on the first date but didn't call each other bf or gf until around 6 months of dating. We moved in together (renting) but were still bf / gf. Only really started using the word 'partner' once we'd done serious things together e.g bought a house, bought a car, got wills and life insurance sorted. Now he is my fiancé and we couldn't be happier.

Bf / gf once kissed and partner after a couple of months both sound crazy imo!

None of the above, you are bf and gf once you have both agreed this.

Partner is someone you are either with long term ie several years or once you live together id say.

BF/GF once you’ve agreed you are. In the age of OLD never assume!

To me, partner suggests a degree of life integration a step up fro BF/GF. Probably living together? But everyone is different.