Will this end in heartbreak ?

[Username109876]

There's a guy who I knew 4 years ago. I always liked him, but things were different back then, he wasn't staying in the country and wasn't looking for a serious relationship.

He lives in France now where he's from, but is saying he wants to come back here to work.
I've already lived abroad and have no plans to do so again anytime soon. I've got a job here in a school i really like and want to establish myself.

We have talked about meeting up and I have said I would like to go to visit him there soon, and he's said he wants to come visit me here.

I haven't got the finances for a long-distance relationship in other countries.

If he came back here to work, maybe it would work. But i'm worried this is going to end badly and is maybe not worth bothering with.

No reason not to give it a try. You really have nothing left to lose.

Dh and I met when we were working abroad. We both went back to our home countries 11 hours flight away from each other. We pretty much were on opposite sides of the world. Neither of us had much money. We were both students- dh went back to uni after a placement abroad and I was starting a post grad programme. We worked and saved and figured out a way to make it work.

It’s nearly 12 years later, we’re married with two dc and very happy. If you’re in the UK and he’s in France, that’s not far at all (I probably commute farther to work than it would be to get to France). If it’s meant to be, you’d find a way.

That's a lovely story really glad it worked out in the end.
I think we need to meet first and see how it goes and see if he plans to move over to the UK, if not then it can't work.
Maybe it's selfish but i've moved in the past for partners, i'm happy where I am and with my job and don't want to go anywhere.

I am worried he just wants one thing though tbh.

You're massively over thinking it. I think with a situation like this, just go with the flow and see what happens/ how he behaves. You've got very little to lose here so I wouldn't fret over it personally

Well, if you’re not open to the idea of a fling, but you also have hesitations about a long distance relationship, you’re starting on the back foot. If you go in with no expectations and enjoy the trips at face value then see what happens... that’s fine.

Nothing wrong with meeting up, seeing how it goes. If LDR isn't going to happen a fling might just satisfy the itch!😗

Thanks everyone, i'll just go with zero expectations, that's definitely the best idea :)