Hi anyone who has the time to read this!
so I've made a couple of posts about leaving my husband. were now in the middle of arranging stuff now. I was planning on keeping everything a secret until I had heard back from housing but unfortunately that hasn't happened. he has been ok, civil almost. I'm hoping I will hear within the next 2/3 weeks about accommodation.
anyway..
when I came in from work Wednesday he had a notepad on the table. he had worked out childcare arrangements and noted down how many hours per day he would have them. he broke his entire 10 week work rota down and how many hours he would have the children. making up crazy times to make it look like he had them more. to be honest it was a minefield when I was looking at it, I stayed calm and took the paperwork away. I then came up with a realistic childcare routine which was in days rather than hours. I'm more than willing to try work round his rota so he sees the kids as much as he can. he works a 10 week rota so out of 70 days he would have the children 18 nights. when he looked at the rota he said it looked fine but he wanted another weekend free. so he wanted to make it 17 nights as Saturdays are "premium nights". I couldn't quite believe that he would rather see his children less and limit it from 3 nights to 2 all so he could have a free weekend?!
on my "rota" he would have x3 Saturdays and sundays to himself and I would have x2 but obviously that wasn't good enough.
Hes also saying that he doesn't think he should be paying me the amount of maintenance that he will be. when I looked on the calculator it said £300pm for roughly 3 nights at his. when I divided the amount of days they will be staying with him it came up as 1.8 days per week, so in the calculator 1-2 days per week comes up at £500 pm. he called me a c**t and selfish and that I'm being selfish. its really frustrating cause id love for him to take them more.
I've thought for a long time that he has narcissistic tendencies but for me this confirms this. throughout our discussions he hasn't once mentioned about how this will affect our kids, he's only discussed how he will gain from his aka free weekends. for me this sounds like a narcissist.
I have an appointment with a lawyer next week, I'm not telling him but I just want to see what a lawyer thinks of everything he is saying.
sorry for the rant 