Would you meet him again after telling you this (online dating)

[RainSmith]

Some to someone for the first time on Sunday night from Tinder. We had messaged over the weekend and then said let’s have a phone call Sunday. So far so good.

Sunday’s call is great, spoke for almost two hours. Arranged to meet today for lunch. Over lunch he told me he’d been online dating since January and met a couple of people so far. I asked when he last relationship was and he said a 16 month one ended shortly after he moved in (they moved in after a year) and they broke up in early December after she said she didn’t see a future.

I had a great time with him today but this has made me hesitant. I’ve been online dating for a year or so and I don’t want to go into something that is doomed from the off. He’s already text asking if I want to do lunch or dinner next week.

That should start by saying I SPOKE to someone from online dating!

I would, just have fun with it. I'm unsure why you think its doomed from the off?

Not following?

Why does another woman's feelings towards a man have anything to do with yours?

Unless there's more you know, like she didn't see a future because of his heroin addiction or something ...

Well I think people jump to online dating when they feel alone. Early December to mid Feb (only just!) seems soon to get back on the horse so to speak!!

Their relationship was less than a year and half. Hardly substantial.

Think you're overthinking, just enjoy it

Wasn’t long but they did move in.

Just seems fast to be back out there and I am wary of being messed around

That wouldn't put me off seeing someone again at all.

Seems okay, wouldn't put me off.

Yeah I don’t see the problem

Not a dealbreaker at this stage but maybe something to keep an eye on

That doesn't seem too quick to me. I've saw people move on from more serious relationships quicker and that's made me wonder but this seems OK to me.

I'd go for a second date, since you like him - unless you're getting other serious signs that he's still very hung up on the ex or possibly still involved?

Two months isn't long, but the relationship was also short. I think moving in together is not always a sign of a serious commitment, intent to stay together permanently/get married, etc. People do it for all sorts of reasons - they're spending every night together anyway so why not save the rent money, someone has extra space, someone has a lease ending or a flatmate they want to get away from, someone's flat is in a more convenient location - etc. etc.

I don’t think it’s that soon. How long is he meant to be single for it to be acceptable

I dont think its necessarily too soon either as it was a short relationship. Enjoy and see where it takes you.

There have been a few posts here lately about a man in a (previous posts was 18 month) relationship where he moved in then they split and the OP in those threads was questioning the speed in which he was dating....

^^ I thought the same.

Wasn’t long but they did move in

And then immediately split up!

Not sure what your ages are, however I know of quite a few relationships that stumble at this stage. When you're dating but living separately its easy to keep incompatible elements at bay. Moving in together is an acid test. You quickly get to see each other warts and all. The fact they split at this point probably shows they weren't as compatible as they thought.

I'd be more concerned if they'd lived together for a year or more TBH. If they'd achieved that it would indicate there was a deeper level of compatibility and intimacy going on which would be harder to get over.

Holy moly, it's only been one date Just enjoy it and take it as it comes.

If my maths is right, they split up after living together for 4 months, not 10 seconds later. And they've been split up for 2 months. I don't see the issue.

If you're online dating, unless you're early 20s, you're likely to find the majority of men on there have a lot more baggage than this.

That wouldn’t put me off.

And I was very critical of every man on tinder.
If I liked him, I’d at least go on another date with him. It’s just a date, you’re not going to get married the next time you see each other

Op I don't believe they were together that short of a time.
And even they were he obviously wasn't a suitable person in her opinion which I think is what is bothering you more.

Causal date but just be aware there is a risk of him going back especially if they have any type of contact afterwards.
And take things slow, enjoy his company and don't move in to quickly.

Enjoy his company, but just keep your concerns in mind.

As far as breaking up soon after they moved in, that happens sometimes. Things that don't bother you when you're an 'overnight guest' can drive you crazy when it's in front of you 24/7. Or perhaps one of them showed a side the other hadn't seen before.