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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

If my boyfriend says ...

36 replies

Beccacats1991 · 09/02/2020 22:35

‘I’m going before I say something I regret’

Should I be offended by this? I don’t know what to make of it apart from I’m very hurt :(

OP posts:
Poorolddaddypig · 10/02/2020 11:57

His poor daughter Sad

YasssKween · 10/02/2020 12:33

As a PP said is this the boyfriend you split with around Christmas? He sounded like a disgusting abuser.

Did he draw you back in? Or are you with another person who is now being abusive?

Either way you need to consider some therapy or you will keep repeating this cycle.

And with every cycle your boundaries will get more blurred, your self worth even lower and your expectations lower still.

Please consider seeking some therapy ASAP. It's shocking that you are asking what to do in this situation when it's so clearly an unhealthy and toxic relationship.

zasknbg · 10/02/2020 12:35

Just get rid

AlwaysCheddar · 10/02/2020 13:06

He’s nasty. Get rid.

leadbetter5 · 10/02/2020 13:08

What does 'high rate' mean?

Why would you want to be with someone who treats their own child like that? What a pathetic bully he is.

RantyAnty · 10/02/2020 13:40

Please get rid of this nasty abusive arse.
You posted about him back in December. He hasn't changed. He's still a cunt. Get rid.

pickletickled · 10/02/2020 14:09

I don't know your back story as other posters appear to. So based on this alone.
He is a bullying arsehole - get rid.
Report him for his destructive bullying behaviour towards his dd, she needs protecting. (tell her mother/her school/ring social services but please don't do nothing)

As I said above- he is a cunt!

Hirsutefirs · 10/02/2020 14:14

Dad ate my homework.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 10/02/2020 15:57

@leadbetter5 she clearly means irate

Alonelonelyloner · 10/02/2020 19:38

What an appalling knob of a man. And you are choosing to worry about something he said rather than the fact that he emotionally abuses a small child. Wtaf is up with this OP? Seriously.

He must have you so mentally knocked out of whack or you are as bad as he is. Which one is it. If it's the former, do the decent thing and inform the mother/SS and leave him. If it's the latter then this is just goady in the extreme. There's nothing more upsetting than hearing about abusive behaviour and a bystander unwilling to really stop it.

Leave the twisted fucker!

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 10/02/2020 21:32

I would take it that he knows he may have a tendency to say stuff he doesnt mean in arguments and wants to stop before it gets that far. Sometimes people need a bit of time for the situation to sink in and to reflect. For example my first reaction is often to say things designed to hurt where if I take a few moments I realise I'm being unreasonable and some of the things I'd have said straight away would have been said from a place of insecurity rather than the other person actually doing anything wrong. So that comment alone wouldnt have bothered me as long as they were ok to talk it through properly say the next morning.

What is not ok in any situation, ever, is to rip up a childs homework infront of them, and I find it strange his comment to you bothered you more than his actions towards a child

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