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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

A bit freaked by fantasy about friend

6 replies

Yisacrookedletter · 09/02/2020 17:42

Not a situation I wanted to drop myself in but have.
So, I have a friend that I more recently fantasized over. I allowed myself to imagine a scenario in which I satisfied her repeatedly. Why I've no clue but I was shocked my mind had wondered that far as it's not happened before. I think she's gorgeous and overall amazing but didn't realise how attractive I must find her.
Anyway, I felt awkward about it and avoided her for a week almost.
I know it's crossing a line as a friend but how wrong is it?
She is oblivious and even if the whole thing means i subconsiously want this to actually happen, it doesn't matter (it just wouldn't and I don't think I do).
I wouldn't consider making a move especially on another female unless i had been given plenty of
a)clear signals that my attention was wanted and/or
b)alcohol
I am an overthinker, maybe I should stop obssessing over why it happened, instead focus on the fact it's not going to happen in real life, nothing has changed and moving forward just be a decent friend.

OP posts:
RuffleCrow · 09/02/2020 17:45

Sex dreams aren't always about sex you know. Google it. Do you actually fancy her or was it just in the dream?

Yisacrookedletter · 10/02/2020 13:53

Rufflecrow it wasn't an actual dream. If it was I wouldn't feel bad about it (can't help what what I think when I'm not fully conscious). So anyway I've decided rather than convincing myself I'm weird to just forget about it.

OP posts:
noego · 10/02/2020 14:00

There's a reason it's called "fantasy"

Yisacrookedletter · 10/02/2020 14:12

Noego oh really.. I know that and I'm not confused about fantasizing. It was the fact it involved a friend I've not thought of in that way before. I felt weird like I was hiding something.

OP posts:
RuffleCrow · 10/02/2020 17:01

These things happen. Your sexuality is what it is. I had a similar thing that underlined to me that i was definitely bisexual. We're a bit like the loch ness monster in that lots of gay and straight people swear we don't actually exist, but we do.

Yisacrookedletter · 10/02/2020 19:26

RuffleCrow thanks and I agree but i personally only know of one other bisexual person.

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