I need help...DP acting suspiciously

[SeaGale]

I feel like I'm going insane.

DP NEVER leaves his phone alone. If he is on his feet, the phone is in his pocket. If he leaves the room. If he goes to the bar from a restaurant table. It quite literally never leaves his side. He has always been like this.

We've just driven to a pub and the second he stepped out of the car he was looking at his phone. I asked what he was looking at and he said "Facebook." I said really?? And he replied that he didn't know how long I was going to be. Getting out of the passenger seat and round the car in literally 3 seconds? No. Doesn't sit right.

If it was new - I’d be worried, but you said he has always been like this.
Sow - what else changed in your relationship that is making you more worried now?

FWIW, I am also attached to the phone. Most of my life and kids life organisation, my financials, my friends, everything is on and is managed through this little device. I almost panic when I think I might have lost it, and I don’t live it lying around in public places either. It’s sort of always with me.

If I were you, I would sneak his phone off the charger while he sleeps. It may be password protected, but you might be able to take a peek. If nothing else, 'losing' his phone for a while will make him sweat if he is up to no good. You could deny knowing where it is, and watch his behaviour around its mysterious disappearance. It could be dating apps, chat rooms, gambling...all sorts. His behaviour is setting off red flags for you and you don't trust him. Surely it is time to evaluate if you want a relationship with a man that you don't feel secure with?

He always carries his phone - normal for him.

You questioned why he looked on his phone when you were getting out of the car? Odd.

I carry my phone all the time, a habit I got into when DC were very small. I always lift it and take it with me. Occasionally I will check something I had been looking at earlier just to see if there is any further comments etc

Have you had any arguments of lately or do you argue frequently as a couple? I take my phone with me everywhere and I don’t feel like I can settle if I have left it on the sofa and my partner is sitting there and I have gone to bed. Not for any sinister reason and if he wanted to look through he could but I like my privacy and would be hurt if he went through it without permission.

The reason I asked about arguments is he may have spoke to his friends via text message and told them what has happened and he might not want you to see this? I do this myself and I can go on a rant about my partner.

If he’s always been like this then I wouldn’t worry too much but if you are both going out somewhere he should be burying his head in his phone it’s plain rude - he should be putting it away and investing his time with his partner

I've always got my phone on me, I always pick it up off the table and put it in my back pocket if going to the kitchen or toilet etc, I don't why it's just a habit and I've certainly got nothing to hide from DP but I would be fuming if he thought he could through my phone without my knowledge because of this.

He's always kept his phone on him but are there any new/recent changes in his behaviour or habits that have caused you to think this is now suspicious?