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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

something fishy going on?

32 replies

chocandwine91 · 07/02/2020 22:05

Hello, I wonder if anyone can offer me some advice please. Me & my boyfriend have been together for four years, two years in I found out he had kissed a family friend & they sent explicit pictures to each other. I stupidly got back with him even though I knew I'd never truly get over it. Anyway last week I got home from work, he called me saying he wouldn't be much longer and that he had to go to a customers house to give a quote for some work. He got home at 3am..... the next morning I said no way were you at a customers house (who you've never met) until the early hours. He said he was and they were chatting about the plans! Am I being paranoid because of my trust issues or is he lying again? My friend says to act normal and try to get more information, like snoop on his phone but it's thumb print protected. Thank you for reading, any advice is appreciated.

OP posts:
TheReef · 08/02/2020 08:48

Bullshit! 3am, he shagged her.

He's shown you twice what kind of person he is, time to believe him and LTB

chocandwine91 · 08/02/2020 16:57

Yep he used that line on me, 'why can't I have female friends'
I don't care who he is friends with however I do care when it's a stranger who he seems to have hit it off with and they've talked for hours until 3am. I've ended my relationship, he won't go easy though. Whenever I say we are over he zones out.

OP posts:
heartyrebel · 08/02/2020 18:58

Flirty texts is not a friend, and 3am is very disrespectful to you, even if he didn't shag her in that time. (My guess is he did)
Turf him out

Greenkit · 10/02/2020 18:52

Any update?

chocandwine91 · 15/02/2020 03:44

He was staying with a friend but came back Thursday and we ended up arguing and he pinned to down by my wrist really hard, wrist swollen and can't make a fist. I pinched and scratched him to get him off me. When I wouldn't let him comfort me afterwards (he realised he had hurt me) he went into the kitchen and popped the powder out of 30 tramadol capsules and threatened to drink it with neat vodka. I called the police & they said they'd send an ambulance but then when they got here he said he didn't drink it - it was a silly way to get my attention. I'm sick with worry, I break up with him and this is what happens, it's draining the life from me I just want to be free

OP posts:
Scarfaceclaw21 · 15/02/2020 04:19

Advise his family of his behaviour so you know some one is looking after him.

Then ring the police, get him charged with assault. I don't know the legal process but get a restraining order against him, change your locks and block his number. This behaviour is frightening and abusive with potential to escalate.

LividLaughLovely · 15/02/2020 04:56

You can’t be responsible for this shit.

Disentangle your lives as quickly as you can.

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