Wondering What Happened

[rocknroller65]

I was chatting to someone on a paying dating site and we exchanged several whatsapp messages. We agreed to meet up yesterday and they seemed keen to meet up.

As I hadn't heard from them last week I sent a message on Friday to say I was looking forward to meeting up on Saturday. There was no response and their Whatsapp is set so that I can't see if the message has been read. I then sent a message on Saturday saying I hope they are doing OK and are they still able to meet. I sent this as a text message. No reply again.

This seems a little strange. I've been on loads of dates and no has done this before. If someone can't meet they have told me even if it's obviously just an excuse.

Has this happened to anyone or do you think something could have happened?

I'm sorry OP but it sounds like you've been ghosted. Sadly it happens all the time with OLD

It's rude, ghosting...happens all the time unfortunately

Oh sorry, this happens a lot. Usually they've got interested in someone else and too rude to tell you or he is married and his wife has organised something around the time of your date. Happened quite a lot on my time on OLD.

I've been ghosted before but not after a definite date has been arranged. That's why I wondered if something had happened

Has he read the WhatsApp? Blue ticks?

He's a twat . Move on . Next .

His Whatsapp is set so that I can't see the blue lines which show if a message is read

Well you could try calling him? No one seems to call each other these days.

But tbh it sounds like he is not worth it.

Don’t worry, it’s saved you wasting time on a fuckwit. I met my husband online and been happily married for 8 years. It takes a bit of time to sort out the diamonds from the coal though! Good luck x

He's a twat and you shouldn't have anything to do with him. He will have done this to tons of people.

He is a coward who has changed his mind but hasn't the decency to just tell you.

Thanks for your replies. It's a good job I messaged and didn't turn up for the date lol

Don’t call him, you’ve already sent 2 texts calling now is desperate. He’s a stranger so even if something has happened to him what can you do about it? You haven’t even met. Just leave it now

Yes, I definitely won't be ringing and there's still been no response to my messages.

Lots of people on OLD only want an ego-stroke online relationship. So when you arrange to meet, they disappear. It's really common, and it's why I don't get involved in much messaging except to arrange to meet the person for a quick coffee early on - it weeds out those idiots.

You'll come across it again, many times probably, unfortunately.

Youve been ghosted. Its VERY common and it is no reflection on you. I know many beautiful, stunningly gorgeous, brilliant, successful women who have been ghosted at one point or another. Its flaky men who just want an ego stroke without putting any effort in. Not to mention, dating has now become like fast food where people put zero effort in any more and seem to just want casual shags with no commitment.

I'll bet you a fiver, you'll hear from him in approx 2-3 months time. You'll get a text out of the blue going "hey!- how are you?" or something similar. It'll be when he needs another ego boost and some attention/flattery. When it comes- take great pleasure in ignoring him. Or be all, "who IS this?" - make him feel decidedly unmemorable!

Christmasfluff - to be fair it was just messaging on one day and then the date was arranged. Constant messaging and not arranging to meet up is a red flag for me. I had loads going on the week before so I didn't message to just say hello hope you are having a good week etc.

I'll just chalk it up to experience. It seems a shame though that I paid the site's membership fee for a month and didn't have a single date.

Thanks again to you all for taking the time to reply.

That's crap op. You did nothing wrong though. Online dating can be tough going. I met someone though eventually and we have a child and are getting married next year so it can definitely pay off. Dust yourself down and onto the next.

The positive online dating stories make me keep trying. I know people who have met long term partners on dating sites as well.

Just to update (in case any of you are interested) I was flicking through my archived messages on Whatsapp. Mr Ghoster has changed his Whatsapp profile pic and I could see he was online.
My message is still unread.

He obviously must have got a better offer! You live and learn