Finally met someone I like and just feel sad and exhausted?

[PencilTwist]

I’ve online dated for 2 years, lots of interest (don’t mean to sound arrogant!!), but nobody I was massively bothered about...

I’ve now met someone I think is great. I seem to have lost my cool with dating (probably because I like him of course), but also I feel sad..almost frustrated? If he takes a while to reply, but has been online most of the day, I start wondering what is the point?

I used to be so resilient when dating and even if I liked someone I would keep my feelings in check initially and move on to the next with ease if it didn’t work out.

I feel exhausted, even though this man has been great so far. I am so bored of the second guessing though and the dating what’s ifs and wondering if it’s going to go anywhere. I know that’s just how it is and advice is probably to just enjoy it...but has anyone else felt this way?

Just feeling a bit down about it!

Maybe you should take a break? Dating is meant to be fun and energizing, not drag you down.

Hate to be a naysayer and would love to be wrong in your case but yes I've been there.

Online dating for 2years and only met 2 blokes I clicked with.

In both cases I had this and it turned out to be a gut feeling that neither of their hearts were in it. With one we genuinely tried for a couple of months but logistics and his work were too much. The second managed to ghost me twice somehow and we only had 2 dates. I still hope I see him again, stupidly!

So my advice is to see where it goes but try and keep your emotions in check for now. There's nothing like endless lukewarm dates and a bit of fatigue to make a spark shine brighter in contrast. Until you have agreed otherwise, I would continue meeting or at least looking for others, keep up that emotional resilience.

I’d say you have to remember you’re the prize. Men are plentiful! You’re looking for one who wants you and will pursue you. If you’re not feeling that you can’t make it be so.

I agree with what muckycat says about gut feeling.

Take a break. Your probably burnt out with the constant looking for a partner, it takes so much of your energy! Have some time to yourself and let this one go. The thing with OLD people always have a few on the go.

My BIL has shown me what blokes can be like on OLD. I’d never trust it.

As per PP above, online dating is exhausting and it is normal to feel like this unfortunately! I forgot the amount of times I would meet someone and after a few weeks they would disappear, and it just knocked my confidence

Dating should be fun though, go with the flow and enjoy his company, it is very early days

It can be exhausting, especially if you don't have the same expectations of a relationship

If you’re not feeling that you can’t make it be so.

Never a truer work spoken, MichaelB !

You would not BELIEVE what I went through with OLD. That's one of my books which is in the pipeline.

OLD is rammed with cheaters, the chancers, the vagina hunters and of course Narcs. Now, this guy may not be a narc but you are rightly sensing something is off and your body is reacting accordingly.

I would imagine you are one option of many. That's not nice but it's still early days.

Take a break. Then utilise your hobbies as a way to meet instead. That why you can do a proper due diligence rather than accepting a facade.

Good luck!

Hello, I have been OLD since March and have finally met someone I really like. But I have no idea how he feels, and he isn't great at messaging and I am sooo fed up with myself trying to figure us out. Wish I could just chill .... let me know how you are OP as I truly understand!

Sadly I also agree this is normal in OLD. Well, it was for me anyway.
For me, I think I had that many time-wasters and disappointments that when you do meet someone who could be a real potential, you constantly look for signs they're not.
I reckon its a self-protection thing. I've gone through it so many times now that I'm finally in a place where I can just chill. I try not to stress about messages or how they feel, just try to relax and go with it.
Easier said than done but the only person you're stressing is yourself. Try not to overthink.