Still get sad after 4 years

[BedraggledBlitz]

Nearly 4 years since split with ex. He cheated, I was devastated and was left a lone parent with 16 month child, ex moved abroad with OW. It took (a long) time but I feel like I'm back on track, fairly happy to be single and focused on being a mum.

He does weekly calls with DC using whatsapp. Today I noticed the profile pic is him and the OW kissing in some luxury holiday resort.

My heart just sank. Now I feel depressed. Its left me wondering if I'll ever really get over this??

I came off facebook for this very reason. I'd get him and her as suggested friends all the time. Or they'd appear on mutual friends timelines.

I can relate. I split up with ex DH almost 7 years ago.

After a long while I finally feel in an even and happy place with myself.

Every so often I'll experience a yearning triggered by a memory or a place. I'll miss him and the 'family' life. Some places are so tied to being with him that I feel a bit swamped by nostalgia.
However, I view this as a natural process and the feelings usually fall away if I don't dwell. They arise, they fall away.

I know I've survived and am thriving.
I avoid him and his fiancee on social media.
I've accepted a measure of sadness at moments as part of life.

They may be kissing in a luxury hotel resort but she opened her legs to a man who had a partner and small child so if she's ever knee deep in baby puke and breast milk she will never get a moment's peace and you will be loving life with your DD. Fuck them.

Oh OP they may appear to have all the things you crave but honestly you’ve got the most fantastic thing of all - a beautiful child who is growing up with an excellent role model and that is YOU. When feelings like this emerge think of it as though you’ve just opened a corner of Pandora’s box and some of your sadness has leaked out. Overnight make a mental note to shut that box lid down once again. Raising a child on your own makes you an absolute hero and you need to remember that x

Thank you. I feel like he must be thinking "thank god I'm not with her anymore."

I'm finding everything a struggle at the minute, seeing that photo pop up on my phone was the last thing I needed.

I am in the early stages of this and I know exactly where you are coming from. It is so difficult to be left for someone else, but like others have said look at your DC, when you feel like this, it's what I do. It will pass, just a little blip.

He's probably done that on purpose.

Are you able to switch to Skype calls or mobile? Just so you don't have to be confronted with that.

Thanks! It was a blip, and I bet there'll be more. I don't think its him being spiteful. It wouldnt cross his mind that I'd be upset, from the start of our separation my feeling were completely irrelevant. In fact all through our relationship I was an afterthought.

So I'm well out of it! Would just rather not be confronted with snapshots of his new life! X

Remember though it's just that. A snapshot. Not a reflection of their every day reality. Fuck them although I appreciate it must he painful xx

Get ya self on tinder :)

Hes a idiot and your doing fine alone be kind to yourself. If your lonely see if anyone nice and sometimes its nice to be courted and avoid having more kids. U will get nice holidays ad well soon as kids grow up quickly xx