Fiance changed password on phone...

[worrywart2003]

Hello,

I noticed last week that my OH has changed the passcode on his phone and it's been playing on my mind ever since. We often use each others phones and we were listening to music on his stream when I picked it up to change. The passcode didn't work and I passed it to him for his thumbprint.

I didn't really think much of it at the time but the next day I keyed in the number ( to see if I'd gotten it wrong) and it has been changed.

Now, I know that there is no need to have it and it may all be innocent but I can't figure it.

Any advice? Should I just chill the FO?!

My iPhone has never prompted me to change a passcode I'd be suspicious if my DP changed his. We know each other's but only out of laziness when we cba to check our own phones so get each other to do it.

Ask him, there maybe a simple explanation as to why he's changed it.

I never had a password on my phone until I got a phone which had thumb print open and the guy at the phone shop set up a passcode with me.

I had nothing to hide but there are things my friends send me that are for my eyes only.

You did check his phone. You went back and checked

I would just ask him or it’s gonna bother you!

My fiancé and me are the same, I use his phone and he uses mine - we know each other’s passwords and it’s never been an issue. We aren’t checking up on each other, we just have a super open relationship, appreciate everyone is different but if he all of a sudden changed it I would think it odd.

I would just ask him - his reaction will tell you if there's a problem.

If you connect to your work email via mail on your iPhone then your work can prompt a passcode change. Mine introduced this a while ago - it was explained to all staff. Very annoying as have to respect their password rules.

Just ask him for the new code and judge his reaction. He'll either:

• give you the code without a second thought (all ok)
• give you the code but change it again afterwards (dodgy)
• take the phone, unlock it and give it to you to use, without telling you the code (also a bit suspect).

My work iPhone prompts me to change my passcode pretty frequently and it can’t be one I have recently used so it definitely can be added as a layer of security/setting. Is it his personal or work phone?

I've never been prompted on any of my iPhones (although I changed to Samsung last year so maybe it's a newer feature) for a change of code, however it does make sense to change it regularly i suppose. OP I do understand where you're coming from it's not that's hes changed it is it- it's the fact that's he's never done it before and now he suddenly has. Maybe just ask to borrow it and then ask the passcode and hopefully he'll be forthcoming. (If he then changes it again afterwards THEN I'd be suspicious!!!!)

If I was challenged over changing a password on my own device that would be a red flag and very controlling. It’s also a sign there’s no trust imo.

If an adult is going to cheat they will anyway regardless of having a phone or not.

Could just be a security measure. Changing passwords etc periodically is sensible behaviour. He just had no reason to tell you yet.
A quick “ah, did you change the passcode? It’s not working” should give you the answer you need. It’ll either be “ah yeah, sorry I did. It’s XXXX” or he’ll refuse the new one. Act according to the response.

Me and DH have always known eachothers passcode.. infact our passcodes are the same. Even our children know them!

If he suddenly changed his passcode i would be concerned. Purely because we've always been open with our phones so i would feel like he was hiding something.

I would ask. You didnt find out because you were checking his phone, it was a genuine reason.

I can see that it is the change in behaviour that is the main thing. You used to have full access, now you don't.

Don't ask, just pick up his phone one day and say, 'my phone's out of juice, what's your passcode?

Anyone would tell the code in that situation unless they had something to hide.

But needing eachother's passcode in order to be secure is not good. You either trust eachother or you don't.

This is so strange to me, I can never understand why people who make these types of posts don't just ask their DH/DP Surely if you're engaged & intend to be married you have a closeness that means you can just ask why they've changed it....

How do these Zombie threads get resurrected?

Not mine then, never asked me in 2/3 years.

This reminds me of a couple I know of, where the guy has lied cheated, and so they have one another's passcode's, never understood it but been told it's normal 🤷🏻‍♀️ hasn't solved anything.

No one knows my phone passcode, not DH not DC. I don’t know DH’s. Why should I? If I needed to use his phone he’d open up and I’d use it - but I don’t need his code. And vice versa.

ZOMBIE THREAD