Embarrassed after messaging two-timing guy

[Werkinggirl]

I was dating someone who I thought was so lovely, but stupidly got attached pretty quickly. He was so sweet compared to other guys i've dated and just really adorable.
Except he wasn't, he was a lying two-timer who wanted 1 thing.
When I found out what he had been doing, I messaged him just basically saying to get the hell out of my life and that if he thought he would see me again he'd be very mistaken.
Then, the next day I was so upset I sent 2 long further messages berating him for what he had done. He had told me some ridiculous lies and led me on for weeks.

Now when I look back I just cringe. I think silence speaks volumes, he didn't even reply to the last messages which made me look even worse. I wish I had just blocked him straightaway and not said a word.

Would you have messaged in this situation ? I was just coming out with all the witty comments I could think of. It would have been so much better to let him wonder and just not say a word.

I can't understand this new trend that people seem to have of not reacting AT ALL to bad behaviour like ghosting or things like this.
It just means that those people normally don't even need to suffer a small bit of fallout from their behaviour such as having to listening to or read a few some harsh words

This!!! This exactly! What IS this trend of maintaining a dignified silence and essentially letting bad behaviours and boundary wrecking go unaddressed?

FYI OP; I’d have done exactly the same and have done in the past as well as wrecked the fucker’s car after he wasted a year of my time. Best feeling ever seeing his smug face confronted with his outrageous lies.

I'm not one for a dignified silence. When I got stood up I wrote the guy a couple of messages that basically told him how unhappy I was about it, one of them even said I don't think you are a complete dick but it wasn't a nice thing to do. If people don't say these things then these guys will just carry on doing it. Maybe next time he thinks about standing someone up he thinks back to my messages and has second thoughts and either goes or messages to cancel.

OP I would have done the same, in fact I have called out a lying cheating bastard before and made damn sure everyone knew what he was like.

I don't understand the trend either. I recently pulled a guy up for his behaviour and almost all my friends said ooh you shouldn't do that, keep your dignity, etc.

So they just get clean away with it. This is a guy I may see again and this way I got an apology more than once and an explanation. Life issues and he is having a rough time.

Who knows now.

The dignified silence would have let him know I was cool with what he did but now he knows he upset me.

Being quiet would have confirmed my acceptance of the situation.

It probably helped you to get your thoughts out at the time and if it means you've burnt bridges, even better.