Finding it so hard to keep on keeping on.
Moved to a new country ten years ago, with my partner and two teens, toddler and a pregnant bump. Ten years on, a whole lot of highs and lows and we are still pushing on!
My husband is not super ambitious, but well traveled, cruisy and charming. We've always been financially stretched. We've often both worked, but exhaustion has got the better of me - and anxiety. I gave up my work to be home with our kids, and now i've discovered im expecting again. At 45! I've been getting increasingly overwhelmed, and just feel like i want to be rescued. But I just feel like everyone rely's on me so much - even feel like Mum to my hubby such a lot. He tries to take on things to help me (like budgeting) but he is just not really bothered and lets things slide. Won't plan a night out for a dinner - unless i'm just about having a breakdown. He got emotionally involved with someone at his work about four years ago, and we've come through it - but it was a dagger in my heart. He's been amazing ever since, but it's hard not to feel old and suspicious. In fact I think that his good humour and affirmations of love almost makes me feel even worse. I feel bitter. Now I just feel scared and a bit lost and a bit silly to be with child again...