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Original poster

Age gap

17 replies

Fgs1 · 21/01/2020 18:57

Hi I’ve recently met a man. We’re just getting to know each other and so far all seems well ... apart from one issue.

We got chatting about past partners as you do, and he said he “very recently” dated a 19 year old. He also commented she had an incredible body. Bearing in mind he is 36. I know it’s not illegal. However, I’ve just felt a bit uneasy and creeped out about it. Am I being silly to feel this way? I’m a similar age to him.

OP posts:
Faez · 21/01/2020 18:59

Why did he feel the need to tell you she had an incredible body? And yeah, I'd be a bit grossed out by a man nearing 40 dating a teen

Original poster
Fgs1 · 21/01/2020 19:00

I have no idea why he mentioned it... maybe to justify it? But that made me feel a bit insecure as if I can’t compete.

OP posts:
Betterbegoing · 21/01/2020 19:10

He sounds a bit grim. Not necessarily because of the age gap, altho it is huge at those ages, but for commenting on her body to you. Throw him back.

Original poster
Fgs1 · 21/01/2020 19:20

Yeah I think maybe that’s it. Almost like he’s still got a thing for her to mention that... and I feel as if he’d be comparing me to her

OP posts:
Cherrygirl3 · 21/01/2020 19:23

Hmmm, 17 years....wouldn't seem as bad if she was 30 and he was 47, but at 19?? My son is 20 and it would freak me out if he was dating someone of 36 tbh. And sounds almost like he was bragging about it Shock. He's obviously very proud of himself! It would put me off massively.

Musti · 21/01/2020 19:23

What a thing to say to the woman you're interested in! Even if she was in her 30s, it's a weird comment to make. How would he feel if yousaid that the last guy you dated had a massive penis

vincettenoir · 21/01/2020 19:25

You are within your rights to feel creeped out by it. But that doesn’t mean it follows that he necessarily is a creep or a perv, just on the basis that he went out with a significantly younger woman. I guess only you can weigh up all the factors and decide if you want to see him again.

PicsInRed · 21/01/2020 19:25

He's testing you.

If you put up with that, he'll know he has a prospect and increase the manipulation/abuse.

Walk away. Block.

Ughmaybenot · 21/01/2020 19:34

NC test..

Faez · 21/01/2020 19:36

Does sound a bit like negging

Ughmaybenot · 21/01/2020 19:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ughmaybenot · 21/01/2020 19:39

Oh god I am sorry, wrong thread!!

Original poster
Fgs1 · 21/01/2020 19:41

Yes I mean we were talking about past partners but I must admit it hurt me a bit to hear about her “amazing body”... clearly he still hankers after her

OP posts:
MikeUniformMike · 21/01/2020 19:51

It's a red flag.
He didn't need to mention her body and even if she had an amazing body it indicates that he is a tactless idiot.

FenellaVelour · 21/01/2020 20:58

It’s not the age gap, it’s the way he speaks about her. He’d be gone if that was me. Ew.

Moomin8 · 22/01/2020 10:05

He's mentioning it to make you feel insecure. And he's bragging to make you feel like he has the upper hand in this relationship. Don't fall for it. It might not even be true imo.

Original poster
Fgs1 · 22/01/2020 13:43

I found out that he is still in contact with her so I’ve ended it with him.

OP posts:
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