How do you get over somebody you are having a child with?

[sumxrose]

I'm 5 months pregnant but due to my partner constantly lying, manipulating and being controlling to me I decided to end things. It had got to the point where I couldn't even speak to a guy without being accused of something. It's breaking my heart especially when he treats me like a friend , when I was jealous I asked if he was speaking to anyone and he said "nobody new" but it was a slight dig at me because girls had tried to get with him and he made me feel like shit. I don't want him to be in my life and I sometimes wish this baby wasn't his.
I don't know what to do.

You probably have 18 years of co-parenting so you need to find a way to communicate that works for you both- separate email address, private social media group - whatever.
When you see ex - pick-ups, drop-offs birthday parties- only have conversations about your child’s needs & arrangements. As soon as the conversation strays, shut it down.
Spend as little time together as possible until the split is less raw. Train yourself to be calm, breezy, distant, factual. It takes practice.

Start a whatsapp group about the baby. Add him and someone from your life who you trust, just to observe, not get involved. Then cut all other contact avenues and communicate about the baby in the group.

Having someone else in the group as a witness should shut any shittyness down, at least until its less raw and things have calmed down.

You've got 4 months where you don't have to see him.
Take this time to work on making yourself happy again. Constantly remind yourself why you split from him.

You just get over it, the way you feel now is just temporary. It doesn’t feel like it now but you absolutely will get over it, think of all the terrible things in life people survive- a Time just heals

He is the childs father, nothing you can do about that. Only speak about the baby so use text/email send scan pics anything about the baby but don’t speak about anything else. It’s best to start now as you mean to go on...

Stay polite but on topic, meaningful baby updates only (I.e. don't look for ways to start a convo because you want to talk to him), no other chat, personal lives completely out of bounds for now. Don't see him until the baby is born unless absolutely necessary. Afterwards, the same. Only meet or speak about the baby when necessary.

Get over him the way you normally would, rekindling interests and friendships and concentrating on looking after yourself and the baby.

In time feelings will mellow and hopefully you can be civil but for now, he is not your friend. You are hurting and probing for information you don't really want and he is enjoying supplying it.

It sounds like he became abusive with the pregnancy. Its very common for abuse to begin when they think you're "trapped".

What follows is advice based on the above.

Do you have family elsewhere in the country? If you have considered moving, do it before the birth. After the birth, the child kept in the area by the father through family court - but not if you leave now.

Don't put him on the birth certificate or he will have automatic PR and will - absent a contact order - legally be able to take/keep your child and you would have to go to court to have the child returned.

Give the child your surname. You grew it, you birthed it and you will raise it. This man will likely be nothing but a thorn in your side. Giving your child his surname would prove an enormous regret (ask me how I know...).

brilliant advice from @picsinred - follow this advice

It pains me when women give a man (who they are not with/married to), their surname. Its an entire load of hassle, and not worth it. I can't honestly say i know one person who has split from their ex, and has said "having the baby with the x surname is fine" . honestly.