What to tell DC about why he’s not seeing his dad at minute

[Treesinthewind]

Hi everyone,
Very long story but I’ve made the difficult decision to stop direct contact between my ex and my DC (Who is 3.5). This is following advice from police and my health visitor. Ex has untreated mental health issues which means he is paranoid and delusional. We’ve been supervising contact but he’s using the time to make accusations and his behaviour is distressing DC. I’m trying to get a court order and hopefully some help with supervised contact, but until then I can’t allow contact. I feel so guilty but have to stand firm as I’ve been advised it’s what’s best for DC. But DC keeps asking when they will see daddy. What do I say? I had been saying he was busy with work when we were seeing him twice a week. I’ve since said “daddy isn’t very well. He loves you but he’s not able to see you at the minute” but I don’t know how long I can keep saying that, and I also don’t want him to worry that I’m going to disappear if I say I’m not feeling well! Any ideas?

I think you can only keep telling him an age appropriate version of the truth and reinforcing that he is loved very much by both of you and that mummy isn't going anywhere.

Sorry op it must be really hard.

Could you get them making get well cards and pictures for daddy? Send them with a note to keep the bridge open but no contact until he is well?

Tell them the truth appropriate to their age and needs. A lie, even a well intentioned one, will erode their trust in you.