How do I get over him?

[Reb4evaaa]

My husband cheated, left me then changed his mind twice !!
How the hell do I get over him? We have kids so unfortunately see him ALL the time!! I don’t want things to be horrible in front of kids either.

Does anyone else’s husband just changed completely overnight? Is this really the person I fell in love with?

Hugs.

Why do you have to see him all the time? You need to get an access agreement in place that you both stick to which will minimise the amount of contact you need to have with him.

You might say that you want to keep a sense of normality for the kids, but things have changed, and you're not a couple so it's far better to get the kids used to the new normal as soon as you can, instead of trying to keep things close to what they are.

That is also healthier and better for the kids in the long term because you will get over him faster, that means a healthier and happier mother, which means healthier and happier kids.

It may be possible after some time has past for you and your ex to become friends and be in each others company without you feeling this way.....but that type of thing generally only happens after a period of time where contact is extremely restricted and kept formal.

You'll soon see him from an outsiders perspective and it'll no longer hurt. You'll realise your worth and that you deserve so much more.

You don't have to see him all the time - have set contact times and door-step handovers.

It is awful for the first months. Agree that it makes sense to have everything pre-arranged so you don’t have a reason to have a conversation.

Doing something cathartic is useful. When my ex left I put everything of his into bin bags and put them in the lobby for him to collect. It was good to get all the traces of him out of the flat.

Hang in there!