Sister having abortion - how can I support her?

[flowertot19]

Looking for some advice on how to support my sister through her abortion - She is 18, she has fallen pregnant whilst being on the pill. I'm unsure of how consistently she was taking it

She works part time and had planned to go to uni next year. Her partner works away so will be unable to attend any appointments with her. She will be having an ultrasound next week to confirm how many weeks pregnant she is, but she has calculated that she will be approximately 8 weeks. I will be attending her appointments with her and will support her every step of the way.

We lost our beloved mum 2 years ago so I am her only support system. I am only 21 and I have just had a baby myself who is now 4 months old. I have never had to support someone through this, and it's especially hard her being my little sister 💔

She is quite naive and thinks she will be going to her shift at work after she has had her abortion.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can help her please? And on how she will be feeling afterwards? I am scared I will say or do the wrong thing.

Thank you in advance! X

Tell her that it's not an entity. She's doing nothing wrong. There's a lot of guilt attached to termination for many women...she has no need to feel guilt.

Just be nice to her...when she comes out, have something cosy and new for her to wear...make sure she has a shower as soon as she gets home so she feels like she's left the operation and the clinic behind.

Maybe buy her a new pair of PJs and some chocolate for when she gets back.x

When I had a medical termination I wouldn’t have been going to work after. Although I wasn’t in pain (just mild discomfort) I was worn out. I had to be on the ward at 8am and didn’t leave till gone 5. I think the emotions of it all were more tiring than the physical effects. I would try to advise her to cancel her shift that day if she possibly can. Some people lose a fair bit of blood and it can make you feel quite faint.
Agree with pp about a shower when she gets home and comfy fresh pjs.

She may be feeling a bit bleak. Her hormones will be up & down so be prepared for that.
Also depending on the type of termination, she may have similar to bad period pain for a while. So hot water bottle, hot chocolate, Netflix, just go with what she wants.
Keep an open mind on return to work, some are fine in a couple of hours, others need a day or two to get their equilibrium back.

Let her talk about it as much as she needs to. She’ll bleed like a period afterwards and might feel a bit crampy so previous posters said, hot water bottles and fluids.., whatever gives her some comfort. I think after 12 weeks there’s a chance that her milk might came in (just a tiny bit) and that happened to my best friend a few days afterward. You’re already being a great support and make sure you take a minute yourself. You’re a strong woman for all you’re going through and once you two have each other, you’ll manage fine in life.

She might indeed be fine to go to work afterwards.

Don't assume how she's feeling about things, she might just be relieved afterwards and want to get on with life as usual. Take your lead from her and try to be upbeat if possible. Don't make it into a huge traumatic event, it doesn't have to be.