How to improve sex life

[Debbierocket123]

I apologise if this is too TMI but I hope someone can help or at least to know I am not alone. My husband and I used to have an amazing sex life and couldn’t keep our hands off each other. However this last year he has been suffering with erectile problems and our intimacy levels have gone dropped dramatically. We still love each other and want to but he’s always either too tired or too busy or some other excuse. I understand it just be hard to talk about for him and I want to help him as much as I can, but it is making me feel less attractive and I am beginning to get frustrated that he won’t do anything about it. He’s a young man so I am worried it could be an under lying condition. He’s been telling me for a year he needs to go to the doctor but he still hasn’t. Is there anything I can do? Or say?

What have you said so far, OP?

he should go to the doctor first. I think you have to talk openly to him thus discussing the whole problem and coming to some decision

I think the doctor but sounds possible tiredness and stress. However, tiredness doesn't stop my husband being up for it

How old is he?

He’s only 35. We have talked openly about it and he even said he appreciates how well I have handled it. We both agreed he needs to see a doctor but it’s been a year and he still hasn’t gone. I’m so worried about him but i try and act like it’s no issue so as not to make it worse...

But it is an issue. I think you need to be really clear how much you miss having sex with him. It doesn’t have to be an accusation but you do need to be honest otherwise he’ll continue to avoid the doctors.

Maybe reopen the conversation but very much from the perspective that you are worried that he might not be well / might have a health problem that needs checking, referring only to the erectile issues as a symptom. Ie a sign of something, rather than problematic in itself. Say you would like him to be checked out (blood pressure etc for example) for your peace of mind. Do make sure he mentions the ED though!

I mean obviously it is problematic but he already knows that, and it just might makd the convo easier if you stress the 'whole health' side