Is the date on or off!? Urgh

[Cherryblossom200]

Hi everyone,

God I hate dating 😆

I matched with a guy in Hinge, he instantly started chatting with me.

We arranged a phone call on Saturday which went incredibly well. 2 hours later we agreed to meet up on Friday 24th and I’ll be in the city already.

He texted me the next day as he was travelling abroad. We chatted most of the day on text, and he asked if we could perhaps meet up sooner - this week. I said maybe we could meet on Thursday, but I’d confirm with him the next day as I need childcare.

I messaged him yesterday morning saying I can make Thursday, he takes 4 hours to reply back saying sorry for the delay as he has be walking a lot (he is still abroad) and that it’s good news I can do Thursday. We had very intermittent conversation after that, he sent me a message in the evening again saying sorry but he had been at dinner, reading a book and now chilling back at his hotel. I didn’t really know how to respond to that. So I haven’t replied, and now haven’t heard a thing from him today.

So I’m just assuming Thursdays date is off!?

Yep I agree with Veterinari

Ok I will message him after lunch! 👍 i overthink things because I do have my walls up, and rightly so. The father of my child walked out when I was pregnant, and I’m slowly finding my dating steps again. I’ve decided to get back out there again, and I’m a little bit rusty!

Penguin - did you eventually contact your H in the end to make arrangements? x

I didn’t have to do anything 😊 he just messaged me 👍 happy times! X

Glad to hear he messaged! I say this all the time but it's really all about relationship styles! I think someone said in another message that he might be more of a 'go with the flow' type of guy, which if you can match that style a bit more, can work.
But he can also do the same so that you both align your styles of communication or relationship and you feel less anxious about it all.

Thanks stay committed, it’ll take me a little time to get used to this all. I do know this guy is very laid back, which is a good thing and a bad thing for me 😆

I think it's about finding the dividing line between "interested" and "too keen". Messaging someone to firm up plans that are already in place - interested. Bombarding them with messages when you're not getting as much back and oversharing details you wouldn't dream of telling someone you'd just got talking to in a bar - too keen. That would be my line, anyway, others may differ. In the end, if you're on the same page to start with, these things are probably less important.

Penguin - did you eventually contact your H in the end to make arrangements?

No initially I left him to state time and place ( the date was arranged) and he did about an hour beforehand - NOT how I like to operate AT ALL so eventually said to him - I don't like you leaving without a tentative next date mentioned and explained how leaving it to last minute made me feel like Plan B . He took it on board.

Well he cancelled, he gave a fairly good excuse and has offered up re-scheduling to next Friday or anytime during next weekend. I’ve tentatively accepted next Friday.

That was plan a anyway, he just wanted to meet earlier hence why we pushed it to this Thursday.

Not sure how I feel about it 😆

It's a bit annoying if he was the one wanting to bring it forward in the first place, but not necessarily indicative of lack of interest. I would stick with the plan but if he cancelled again, I'd be sodding him off!

Don't overthink texts, we send them in haste and often they can be misinterpreted. Meet, it's the only way!

Too be fair, he said he has to go to a meeting tomorrow just before we were supposed to meet, he said he would try and re-arrange the meeting or duck out. But I said maybe easier to re-arrange our date.

But he had just messaged me again, seems to want to keep the conversation going. So I’m not worrying too much x

Glad you're still in touch, sounds like him not being able to manage this 'date b' is just one of those things. Best wishes and please keep us updated. :)

Thanks, he definitely seems still keen and I think this was just one of those things. He’s promised to take me out for dinner and drinks, all paid for on the next date 😉