Can he be helped?

[OneMoreTryOMT]

I'm having some issues with my BF of a year. Mainly his mood and feeling like he's playing mind games. For a few days he'll be happy and joking around and then then like the last few days he's been really quiet and miserable.

I've asked him several times what's wrong and if he's okay, as I feel like it's me. He just keeps saying nothing is wrong.

I feel like he has no life aside from me and bases all of his reliance on me to be happy? He doesn't see friends or do things in the evening.

I'm a very positive and driven person with a lot of passion for the things I do such as my job, my love of books and learning etc. I mentioned to him earlier that i feel he has no life and that he seems to just be existing. I can't see how this can make him happy. I've mentioned this to him several times before and he's now agreeing that he feels numb sometimes but doesn't know why.

I feel it's starting to bring me down. For example, I get one child free night per week but due to ongoing health problems I've looked into an exercise class which falls on this evening. When I mentioned it, his first response was about our time? He knows how much pain I've been in and I'm trying to help myself without relying on medication.

I feel like he sulks sometimes or it's mind games? I gift opportunity for him to talk and he always says nothings wrong, then come 8pm when trying to relax it finally surfaces what is wrong.

I really want to know if he can be helped or if I'm just fighting a losing battle. I'm feeling like his therapist! Please help

He doesn't sound like a good fit for you.

I don't think it's unreasonable for him to want to spend your child-free evening together, but it's the rest of it, really. He doesn't sound like he has much about him.

Was he always like this or has his MH taken a downturn?

His MH has always been like this but I think in the first few months he disguised it well. I appreciate its our only night, however he spends most nights with me atm and we don't usually go out anywhere on that day unless it's a special occasion. We stay in the same as every other night.

Just a hard situation to be in as I need to feel able to be me.

So, he's got no life, sees no friends, doesn't want to do anything, and he's a mood-vampire. And he wants you to stay home with him all the time.

There's more to life than this, OP, as you well know. He's not right for you and you don't owe him a relationship. I'd end things, tbh.

Your question is "can he be helped?" - if he's depressed, he needs to seek treatment and actively engage with making changes. You can't do it for him. You can't "fix" him. Your relationship will not heal him.

Unless he's willing to get help, you should bail.