Need someone else's view...was IBU

[bradfordtoliverpool]

Been with DP 17 years. 2 Dc (6 and 10).
Mil never been very nice to me, for no reason at all. Always favoured other children and never really bothered with dp and not generally very nice to him and favours other grandchildren. It is something that has always bothered me but as it is dp mother I have never said anything.
Anyway the other day I ended up telling dp that I don't like him mum, she favours other grandchildren and if he didn't mAke the effort with her I honestly don't think she would care and we wouldn't see her again. He took what i said really bad, said he would never agree with me and now I feel really bad for telling him and there is a really awkward atmosphere in the house between us.
Was I in the wrong for telling him what I thought?

It’s not clear what you were trying to achieve here. A better relationship with the mil or a bigger rift.

From what you say, she is LC with you and because of that doesn’t have much to do with your kids. That suits you, except you don’t know how to explain it to your children. But any age appropriate reason would do.

Why did you get into a debate with your DP that resulted in such a hurtful opinion being voiced. Because it is just your opinion.

Maybe you are right and she has always treated him differently but you weren’t around to see that. You only know she has been distant with him since you came along.

That she does not like you doesn’t make you an awful person. Just not someone she likes to be around.