Me and my partner have been together for nearly 3 years. We have 1 baby together who is 4 weeks and he has 2 children from previous.
Just moved to a lovey area and we were so happy when we moved here and excited about the baby etc etc.
Now I just want him to leave. I’m sick of his lazy selfishness, no consideration for anyone other than himself and his kids (not ours) he favours the eldest. These problems haven’t just arose I am now realising it’s been there for a while and I’ve stuck my head in the sand and over the last 3 years there has been some difficult times and maybe I thought his behaviour was down to these situations but now I’m realising this is him as a person.
I don’t know how to approach the situation to ask him to go as he doesn’t have anywhere else to go, his mum can’t take him in and he hasn’t got anyone else to ask. I’m just fed up and it’s causing tension in the house. I’ve tried to speak to him about things that I think can be easily resolved but it ends up with him saying dismissive things like ‘just get on with it’. We don’t have sex and haven’t for months. He doesn’t want to and I fee like I’m his mom.
I do everything I cook I clean (I do what I can with a newborn) I do al the night feeds I taxi his kids around I sort the bills. He does come in and make tea occasionally but leaves the kitchen a bomb site after or he will wash up but expect me to be laying out the red carpet. He does get up and go to work but i just think so what. My job as a mum never ends. Other little things is like his snoring, he is a very loud snorer but does nothing to help the situation just grunts and groans and says he can’t help it which I understand but when I have a baby who has colic and I’m running on minimal sleep anyway he expects me to lay down next to him and not disturb his lawnmower debute then get up refreshed ready to take on the next days tasks. Tried speaking to him about this and other things and he might make half arsed effort for a week but then it’s back to normal.
Another thing is money he wants it al spent on him and his kids. I pay the bills and he pays towards the house costs but no where near what he should be lying. I should pull him up on it obviously. He has an unrealistic expectation of holidays days out buying a new car new stuff for the kids but it’s me and my son who have to miss out whilst he’s giving his kids everything. I got my maternity grant today he’s talking about buying the kids new beds - they’ve just got some bunk beds - second hand albeit but there’s nothing wrong with them but if I put my foot down and say no it’s like dealing with a child.
I want him to leave I’m just sick to death of him but I don’t know how to approach it. I have told him before I want him to go but he just refused to leave and it caused a lot of upset for me and I don’t want my son in that environment. I don’t want to have to call the police because it will be classed as a domestic incident and social services will be notified and again another thing I don’t want on my back.