Husband and parents

[Itsveryshiny]

Im desperate for an advise. I am Nepalese and my husband is english. We are going to Nepal for 3 weeks so that my parents will see their 2 grandchildren. However my husband thinks that my mother doesnt like him around and he prefers to “stay out of the way”. My mother is not good with english and finds it difficult to understand english accent. But that doesnt mean that she dislikes my husband. Shes just really shy and probably embarrassed. I kept telling my husband that but it doesnt seem to work. Also while in Nepal were gonna stay in my parents house for 3 weeks. So im gonna have to put up with him just moaning about everything. I dont want them to dislike each other. Just need advise on the best way to deal with it as it is just stressing me out. Also i dont want this to affect our marriage.

@Itsveryshiny I got the living abroad away from my family AND having to spend weeks at a time with his family, if it helps to know that it could be worse 😂

Not a bad idea to go alone. But don't blame him for finding it hard to fake happiness for three weeks. You'll just end up fanning the flames of your own resentment.

I have a similar situation with my in laws, my wife isn't english and her mum in particular doesnt like me, so i only go over at xmas because i dont want to miss xmas with my dd, but if she goes over during the year, i just dont go

It might help if you look at things from your husband' perspective as well. He doesn't hate your mother, he is just not comfortable to stay in her house for 3 weeks and I think no one is unless the person is your own family and you have lived with them since your childhood. Sure you see his parents every week and that is great on your part but even you would not be comfortable living with them for 3 weeks under the same roof.
I also think you are quite angry right now because you said you are making sacrifice by marrying him. I am sure you don't mean that otherwise it is not a marriage. What I just want to say is cool down otherwise things will be said that cannot be un said.
The important thing to know is why is it bothering you so much. Is it just cultural. When you marry into different cultures people say things. May be someone is saying "oh , your husband does not like to visit us because he is white" . I am sure no one in your family is doing it but may be some jealous non relevant person. When you marry a person for love , get over these things.
Your husband is going , even if he is not happy just be glad. May be some day he will get over with the awkwardness and he will be good friends with your mum.