Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Can you have a 'crush' as an adult in a secure relationship?

4 replies

andstillsomehowhere · 06/01/2020 12:38

That's it really. Don't want to go into too much detail as I feel I may be flamed (ie, can't be that secure if you're thinking about someone else..) but can you have a meaningless crush as an adult if it is someone you know but you also wouldn't dream of ever doing anything and you love your partner very much and are as attracted to them as you were when you first met?

I feel soooooo guilty someone is popping into my head (esp as it's DPs new friend). IS this normal? I'm struggling with the guilt. Its like unwanted thoughts I can't seem to shake. I have a great relationship with my partner and this is making me feel uneasy because I'm not used to keeping things from him, but I can hardly share this with him!

OP posts:
NoPinkPlease · 06/01/2020 12:39

Totally normal! As you say, you aren't going to act on it, and sure it'll pass. In the meantime you might just enjoy the fantasy - and don't feel guilty! You're just normal :-)

andstillsomehowhere · 06/01/2020 12:54

Thank you so much! It's just horrible because I am and always have been a 100% loyal person and this has really got to me thinking I'm a terrible person. My DP would be devastated if he knew! Thank you again x

OP posts:
PragmaticWench · 06/01/2020 12:56

Completely normal. I believe it's inevitable myself and DH will have this at points in our married life, it's what you do about it that matters, or DON'T do!!

andstillsomehowhere · 06/01/2020 13:00

Thank you. Not a chance would I ever do anything, I just genuinely have never had this before! Feel so much better now. Thank you x

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page