Meeting Partners Parents...

[singleedition]

I’m just curious on what people’s thoughts are on whether or not you should bring a gift for your respective partners parents the first time you meet them

I’ve always taken a box of chocolates/flowers etc... nothing excessive, but upon discussion with friends apparently this is a weird thing to do 🤷🏻‍♀️

Any thoughts? :)

No I haven’t. Seems a bit try hard imo. I like to give token gifts but not until more friendly and familiar.

I wouldn’t

I wouldn't consider turning up to anyone's house without at least a bunch of flowers /chocs/wine if I am being 'hosted". As in , you have been specifically invited .

Far from ' try to hard' it's basic good manners.
As the host I wouldn't slam the door in their face - but I would be judging your upbringing and maturity not to know this stuff already.

The only time it is NOT expected is when you meet by accident, and 'end up back at their house' . This is pre planned so take the token gift .

to - too

Why not? No one could be offended by you bringing a small token gift and most would be delighted.

I brought flowers the first time I went to his parents' house for dinner as a thank you for having me. Nothing wrong with that!

That was the first time I met them, should've clarified

I wouldn’t and haven’t. Agree it seems try hard

I would

I think it depends on how much the parents influence. For me, my parents and DH parents have a lot of influence so if they didn’t initially like me, it would have put questions in DH mind.

I also wouldn’t ever show up to someone’s house for a planned thing without a wine bottle or some sort of little gift.

I wouldn’t go to a friend’s for dinner without taking something and this is the same, so yes I’d take something, flowers usually.

I’d rather be seen as try hard than rude. Maybe I’m a bit old fashioned though.

I met my OH's parents a few times before being invited for dinner so my first visit wasn't the first we met, however, I wouldn't have gone over to theirs (or anyone else's) home for the first time without taking a small something. It's good manners and, unless you go extremely extravagant, definitely not try hard.

Reading with interest as that will be me in two weeks ....

The first time I met OH's parents was in a pub. Pre arranged but on neutral ground so that would have been unnecessary. The 2nd time we went to their house and I told OH to take flowers for his Mum. She knew that was my idea

How bizarre. Two threads asking the same question at the same time - are you the same person under a name change ?

Here