What the hell does this mean??

[Bewildered36]

So I have had a crush on this guy for months. We are new friends but have recently been on 2 dates were he ‘friend zoned’ me on the last date. He constantly sends mixed messages and flirty messages. When we’re around each other everyone asks what’s going on as the chemistry is obvious. I always catch him staring at me and he constantly compliments me. We spent Christmas Day together.

I sent him a drunken message telling him how I feel about him and that if he doesn’t want more than friendship then the mixed messages and flirting needs to stop as it’s messing with my head.
He responded with...
Why must things be black and White what's wrong with a bit of grey or cream??
What the hell dos this mean? When I asked he didn’t respond so I asked if he just wanted a friend you benefit thing (which I am not interested in) he responded with ‘no I’m not that type of bloke.’
And still no explanation. He is so confusing!! He has invite me for dinner next week but I still don’t know where I stand with him.

What do you mean by friend zoned?
Could it be that he wants to get to know you before getting sexual? 2 dates isn't a lot to decide that he doesn't want anything romantic with you...

He's not interested but happy to keep you on the back burner when he feels like a bit of ego boosting.
Surely you realise this?

He's messing you about if you ask me. If he really wanted to be with you then he would. He's keeping you dangling until something better comes along. I would tell him to do one and find someone who is genuinely interested.

He wants to have you on a piece of string but doesn't want to label it as a relationship. Up to you if you're happy with that but if not then cut all ties.

They have only had 2 dates!! You pp don't actually know any of that

How did he friend zone you?

I think it is a bit pushy to demand a status after 2 dates.

@CodenamVillanelle so if someone friend-zoned you on the 2nd date, would you be keen to continue?

He's an arse

Recent friends, two dates and you spent Christmas with him and worried it's now over. Why the race?

If he fancied you, you’d know. Agree with pp that he just wants to have you there as a backup option (for sex, not a relationship).

I am not pushing for relationship but clarification of where this is heading as I’m constantly getting mixed messages.

For example ‘I really wanted to kiss you tonight’
Invited me for Christmas dinner with his family as I was by myself.

We have been flirting back and forth for over 6months so this isn’t something new.

Friend zoned me by saying it’s lovely to have dinner with a friend. He says he just not in a place for a relationship which is fair enough but why the mixed messages??

As soon as I start moving on he jumps back into the frame again with his flirty mixed messages. I’m just confused but realise I just need to walk away. Just hard when we’re friends

He's not interested but happy to keep you on the back burner when he feels like a bit of ego boosting.
Surely you realise this?

Yip..

He enjoys the excitement and back and forth of flirty messages, meeting up, possibly genuinely enjoys your company as well. For these reasons he hasn't pushed you away completely because then those would stop happening.

He doesn't want a relationship though. That won't change.

You need to accept the rubbish status quo that leaves you hanging or call time on it yourself. He will not be what you want him to be.

He likes you a bit and wants to keep you around, but isnt sure he likes you enough for it to become serious or long term.

If that makes you feel a bit down, insecure, or like you aren't good enough - and I can understand how it would - then you should stop seeing him.