I don't think I love him any more

[BlueSnow18]

How do I break up my family and ruin my DS's life?
For a while now me and DP have been really rocky. I've tried so hard to make it work, spending more time together and giving him his own space. I've spoken to him many times about how I feel neglected and unloved to which he replies 'I will try harder'. It never lasts long.
Recently I've begun to give up trying as I've realised I don't think I love him/ our relationship any more. I've actually thought about what it would be like to be a single parent and the only upsetting thing is ruining our DS's childhood. They love when daddy comes home and the thought that I will be the one taking that away from them is destroying me.
I guess what I'm asking is has anyone been in this position before? What did you do? How do I break it to DS?

I’m so sorry OP. You are punishing yourself. I think you maybe need to reframe this. You will NOT be ruining your DS’s life. Yes of course it’ll be hard, but his life will NOT be ruined. Please please don’t stay in a relationship “for the kids”. My mum stayed in an awful relationship with my dad for me and it was heartbreaking to know this. I felt so much guilt.

Your relationship with your husband teaches your children what a relationship should be like.

Do you want this type of marriage for your children when they grow up?

If the answer is "no", you need to end it FOR your children.

You will not be ruining your DS's life. 50% of children come from divorced families, do you think they've all had their lives ruined?

Your DS will still see his dad. If he's a decent parent then your DS will have a good relationship with him. Break ups are never easy but at least you can say to yourself you tried to make it work.

No advice cos I’m in the exact same predicament, could have written this, just giving you a hand hold x

It's a massive decision. And it will be hard. The guilt I felt for my decision was tremendous.
However you deserve to be happy. Life is short and two separate happy parents will always be better than parents who are together and miserable.
It took me a long time to decide to end my relationship, together 13yrs married for almost 3. My two children were 9 and almost 6 at the time. We're 2 1/2 years down the line. It has been incredibly hard but I'd do it again to be as happy as I am now.
Your child will understand in time. Sending hugs and support x

You won’t be ruining your child’s life,far from it. Daddy can still pick him up and he can have uninterrupted one on one time with daddy half the week at his house.

Agree that divorce doesnt ruin a childs life. It just gives them a new normal.

My children see their dad every Wednesday and every other weekend. He probably spends more quality time with them by having them by himself than he ever did when he was with me.

@Tot21 you will do way more damage to your children by staying in a toxic relationship than you will by leaving. Never, ever, ever, "stay for the children", they will not thank you for it.