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Original poster

What would your DH do?

21 replies

Greeeeen · 02/01/2020 10:39

I've been ill for around a week with gastroenteritis which seems to clear up for a day and then returns. The doctor has sent a sample off for a analysis.
For this reason, DH hasn't been able to enjoy much of his usual free time for hobbies (neither have I of course!)
I said last night that I felt better and he should go out today to play sports with friends. However, I have been doubled over with diarrhoea all morning and I have been sick.
He is asking if he can still go.
We have 2 young DCs and he will be out all day. I feel guilty saying no and he has been so kind all morning, but he wants an answer. I hate it when he puts me in this position.

OP posts:
Dogisout · 02/01/2020 10:41

Ofcourse he should not go. And nok sulk about it. Hope you feel better soon

handsinthebucket · 02/01/2020 10:43

Does he know how bad it's been or have you been hiding it? If he knows then it's a bit ridiculous that he's asking for permission rather than just recognising the situation and taking action, but I'd tell him he can go if he arranges childcare.

Original poster
Greeeeen · 02/01/2020 10:48

He knows.
But he also knows that it clears up quickly again, hence him still wanting to go as he thinks I will be better in an hour.

OP posts:
Modestandatinybitsexy · 02/01/2020 10:52

Can't he wait to see if you are better and catch up with his mates later? Don't think DH would leave me in this position unless he could leave the kids with someone else.

Chottie · 02/01/2020 10:56

Can he go out and take the DCs with him so you can have a proper rest?

DBML · 02/01/2020 11:27

What would you do if he had to work rather than go out with friends? Not trying to be funny or anything...just wondering?

Shoxfordian · 02/01/2020 12:15

Why is he asking you and not just making an adult decision that you're too sick to look after the children alone?

Greenkit · 02/01/2020 12:21

Asked DP, his reply

I would stay home and take care or the DC and you.

What would I do if we didn't have DC, I would stay home and look after you.

However I said in that instance I would tell him go

Goinghome20 · 02/01/2020 12:23

He would stay until I felt better.

OneDay10 · 02/01/2020 12:57

My dh would stay without asking because he would be very concerned about dc being taken care of. He would have sent me straight to rest and taken over my DS. You really cant help how you feel, so its just unfortunate but he needs to stay and go out another time.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 02/01/2020 13:03

To be fair he's asked rather than just going. You can say no that you don't feel well enough to look after the kids.

How young are the DCs? Are they old enough for a couple of films and some snacks or do they need full time attention?

mamato3lads · 02/01/2020 13:09

Hes asked....not just gone.

Say no if you're not up to it. Simple x

Original poster
Greeeeen · 02/01/2020 13:11

One can entertain himself.
The other needs full attention.
He hasn't gone, but it's sulking hugely as I haven't had the runs since he decided not to go and I've felt better. Told him to go but he says it's too late. I've been doing a few jobs at home and he is annoyed that I haven't heen in bed resting as he "could have gone out afterall."

Completely get his disappointment but never could have foreseen that I'd be feeling better. The doctor has said that the symptoms of gastroenteritis are unpredictable and come and go which is what I am finding, so an opportunity to get a few jobs done whilst feeling a little better is welcomed. I'm not really eating and feel tired so certainly not 100%.

OP posts:
thedancingbear · 02/01/2020 13:15

Why is he asking you and not just making an adult decision that you're too sick to look after the children alone?

One would assume that the OP was better placed to know whether she felt up to looking after the kids. That's why they had a conversation about it.

hellsbellsmelons · 02/01/2020 13:27

and he is annoyed that I haven't been in bed resting
So go to bed and rest.
This is probably the reason it hasn't gone yet.
You need some proper rest.
So go and get it.

Shoxfordian · 02/01/2020 14:06

The op has had diarrohea and been sick
Doesn't take a genius to work out she's still unwell

GiveHerHellFromUs · 02/01/2020 14:09

@Shoxfordian she's the one who told him to go in the first place

Shoxfordian · 02/01/2020 14:10

Yeah last night when she felt better but she's been sick again this morning so clearly not better

GiveHerHellFromUs · 02/01/2020 14:13

@Shoxfordian yeh so he's asking how unwell she is. It's perfectly reasonable of him to ask.

Its possible to have diarrhoea and be sick then feel fine 20 mins later. And OP has said it does clear up quickly each time.

DBML · 02/01/2020 14:57

Knowing the symptoms come and go, I would have said ‘go out, you’ve been great this past week. You deserve a break. I’m sure I’ll manage, but if I do struggle I’ll call you to come home’.
Then on another day when I was feeling better he’d have the kids so I could get out and enjoy some me time.
I’d be pissed off too seeing you up and about and cleaning the house. At least go to bed and don’t give him a reason to feel so disappointed.

Sw05 · 02/01/2020 18:38

As a husband knowing you were ill I’d stay home to let you rest and take care of the children. There’s other times to go out with friends.

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