Is he cheating?

[whatshappeningnow1]

Furious been suspicious of P for a few months now, started being really sneaky with his phone quite literally never taking it out of his coat pocket!
A month ago I found him messaging other girls he apologised and blah blah blah and I forgave cos I'm a mug probably.
Tonight he fell asleep and I did the bad thing, I snooped.
On messenger I knew he would delete any evidence but I know other ways to find out,
His recently searched on messenger was a girl who's pictures he's liked in the past and another girl and me.
In his notifications a girl accepted his friend request, clicked on her and he's already liked her picture.
In his search bar on Facebook was another girl,
Snapchat I'm not very good on I never use it so help me,
On "chats"
He has 4 girls but when you click on the chats there's nothing there.
I'm wondering do you have to of had a conversation with the person for the chat to be there or do they automatically go there when you become friends.

Either way he's technically cheating isn't he?

Whether he’s cheating or not the relationship is over because you feel this insecure due to his actions to be invading his privacy. You need you be completely up front with him and you both need to be honest. But regardless of the outcome it sounds like your relationship is now over

I wish I could just tell him straight but all he does every time is worm his way out of it because I don't have full on factual evidence I'm sick and tired of it now.
I try so hard to be happy I am insecure because he knocked my confidence so many times,
But when I try and talk to him about it he will just spin me a web of lies and then somehow make me feel guilty like he has no life without me 😭

Cheating or not he sounds like a dickhead who is seeking out other women he fancies and interacting with them and you already know that about him as you've caught him before.

If he hasn't fully cheated already it sounds like he will at some point. Either way there doesn't seem like much point staying with someone who doesn't respect you enough to be doing this. You'll likely spend your life spying on him only to eventually be proven right.

Why are you with him when you are so unsure and unhappy? Being single is better than this mess you are in right now. I’ve been there x

Because he pressures me into this life,
I feel like even if I said I'm not happy and want out he will just never let me go but why? Why speak to other girls if he doesn't want to let me go?
The last time I left him he took an actual overdose and ended up in hospital!
It's so confusing for me

Chats on Snapchat automatically delete quite quickly, it's the whole point.

It doesn't matter if he's cheating, he's behaving inappropriately and has caused you to be like this. You can't trust him anymore.

Why? Because you are his safe, comfort blanket and they are an ego boost.

It must have been awful to see that he is contacting other women he fancies. Now ask yourself can you forgive that (I wouldn't) and do you trust him to never do it again.

Don't waste your time on someone that doesn't respect you.

You are not responsible for him and you do not have to stay in a relationship with him on his say so.

A suicide attempt is not a good reason to stay with someone, harsh as that may be. You have the right to be happy and you don't owe him a relationship. His mental health isn't your responsibility. And it doesn't sound like it's love, but control behind it.

No advice really and I agree with pps but there is a way to set snap chats so my messages stay for 24 hours you go through the chat, click on the profile pic and then the three wee dots at the top and choose delete after 24 hours. It does show on screen it's been changed but isn't overly noticeable xx

He took an overdose when you left?
He is an emotional abuser.

He cheats but doesn't want you to leave because he is an emotional abuser. You are his 'primary supply'. The person he drains 24/7 in order to feel good. But that is never enough for these sorts.

Often in abusive relationships (which make no mistake, you are in) we stay because we say to ourselves 'he must love us deep down, otherwise he would leave'. But he doesn't stay because he cares, he stays because he is the bully on the playground and you are his favorite victim.

It is also comon to get into this cycle of 'if I could just explain to him why his behaviour is hurtful, he would stop'. But you cannot explain empathy to someone. He knows what he is doing is wrong (no matter how much he may try to convince you he 'doesn't get it', or that you are oversensitive or crazy or whatever). He gets it - he just doesn't care.

Videos on narcissists might be a good place to educate yourself on what he is. Melanie Tonia Evans on youtube is good on the subject.

Lundy bankrofts book 'why does he do that?'too.

Your rtner is emotionally abusive. You do not need to 'prove' someone is cheating on you in prder to leave. It is a relationship, not a court. He treats you like shit. It is not your responsibility if he overdoses. Move away and block all contact.

He's denying it all, apparently if you click on someone's face by accident they go into recently searched,
Snapchat he's never spoken to them 🤦🏼‍♀️
I hate not having real evidence because he makes me feel like I'm being obsessed

You need to take a step back and realise it doesn't even matter if he is cheating. What matters is being with him makes you miserable. Because he is a horrible person. Do you want to be miserable, obsessive and driven mad for the rest of your life? Because its never going to get any better with him.

You can leave him because you're unhappy, you know.

No I don't 😔 I find it really hard to disconnect because I never put my own feelings first I don't even know how to become a cold bitch 🤷🏼‍♀️

It's not about becoming a cold bitch - is that what he says to you?

Being in a relationship isn't supposed to be like this.

It isn't being a cold bitch to walk away from someone who is treating you like shit. It is just having proper, grown up boundaries.

He is the cold one.

Their name only goes into the Facebook toolbar if he types their name in. If you click on their face it doesn’t store as a searched name.

There's something wrong with me I just can not get any balls at all! I'm wayyyyy too soft but I know it and I can never seem to change,
I'm not turning into to a paranoid girlfriend I'd rather be alone!

Then be strong enough to own your feelings op, regardless of with he says or does. Tell yourself you're worth more than this and this is not the path you wish to be on. X

He took an overdose to guilt trip you.
BS he searched them and had a conversation with the girls on snapchat. From what I know Snapchat messages delete anyway.
You need to leave, block all the ways he can contact you and get on with your life. He will never change.
If he took an overdose just to win you back he's a complete utter scumbag.

You should address your people-pleasing and self-esteem issues. It's no good just holding up your hands and saying you know you're too soft and staying put.

This shit could ruin your life and you only get one shot at it. You shouldn't spend it held hostage to a bloke who really doesn't give a shit about your happiness.