Anger Problems

[Prettyme12]

Should you have to put up with your boyfriends anger problems? Anything and everything turns into such a drama and I am always the one that has to be the bigger person and try and solve it and if I don't he then gets re angry if it doesn't go his way. When you love someone, is it your responsibility to do something or the persons?

If he has genuine anger problems then he will not be able to control himself in public, at work, when irritated by someone who could easily knock his block off etc etc etc.
If, as is far more common, he can control himself in most environments but loses his temper frequently with you then you have an abuser on your back. Get rid if that is the case. You will not be able to "fix" him.

How tedious. It sounds like he doesn’t respect you. Why do you stay? That would be a deal breaker for me.

Anger problems my shiny arse. He is a controlling, manipulative fuckwit. He kicks off to keep you in your place. Get rid.

I love him and he has such a good soul, but he is like a child when he doesn't get it his way or if he thinks its on the attack. It is so hard when feelings are invested

A good soul my fucking arse. He intimidates you (the person he should most value and respect) when you dare to have an opinion that is different to his and he keeps intimidating you until you back down and comply. By what definition is that the behaviour of someone with a good soul? Learn to unlove him as quickly as you can or he will reduce you to a shadow of your former self.

but then how can someone do such nice things and be so supportive of me and my family, but then 10% of him is like this....

Because he believes he is entitled to behave this way to control you.

You can't change him. He chooses to behave this way.

Nobody is 100% awful - that's not real life, it's not monsters vs everyone else - but you shouldn't be trying to put up with 10% deliberately awful.

It will get worse.

If you choose to stay you're choosing to destroy your future.

Throwing your life away is harder than leaving an abuser.

Prettyme12

How can you love someone like this?. He will take your niceness, support and naivety and use these against you to destroy you from the ground up. This person targeted you and deliberately so because of your rescuer and or saviour tendencies. Are you also really confusing love here with codependency?. What did you learn about relationships when you were growing up and why are your boundaries so very poor now?.

Do not put up with this from him.

How can you also quantify his behaviour as being 10% like this. How on earth did you arrive at such a figure in the first place?. You're still swallowing the shit sandwich from him here by being with him at all. He is dragging you down with him.

Boring and tense way to live. No man is worth this kind of stress in your 1 life. I read about men like this and call them The Unfuckables - Why would you want such an out of control I'll mannered pain in the arse to even lay a finger on you?

Angry people afford themselves the right to leech onto someone then aim to give them a pessimistic, fraught life. It's up to you to have the sense to bin him off, unless you want to waste your years on him then cry bitter miserable tears in later yearsbof course.

I love him and he has such a good soul

^^Come on now

It's time to take the blinders off. He does just enough "nice" things to keep you in the hook. His abuse is only going to get worse and worse when he knows he's got you fully under his control. It's time to start thinking with your brain,