Am I living the life I want?

[protectyou]

First time poster, I am in my mid thirties living in a nice little house with my boyfriend of 3 years, we have a pet together and things are fine. We have been through so much together and when things are good they are really good, I have a good job too, training to better my career etc. The reason I write this post is because recently I can't help but wonder if I'm living the life I really want. I love my boyfriend very much and we have been through so much together, but I am beginning to feel a little trapped inside my own head, I feel too young to have my life mapped out before me. My boyfriend is wonderful most of the time but life with him can be difficult at times, he suffers with a few mental health issues which I completely understand, having been there myself, but at times it feels like he can use these to stop me going out and seeing friends and family etc. We both have a lot of family that aren't nearby and often I feel miles away from my own life, if that makes sense. Sometimes I dream of having a life close to my family, shifting career and feeling a little free again. I feel very selfish having these thoughts though and at the same time, I can't imagine my life without my BF, but I know for sure he would never relocate closer to where I want to be. Advice or anyone relate to having this type of feelings? Would love to feel a little less alone.

Seems you are growing out of this relationship. You're feeling stagnated now and you will only feel this more so as time goes on. Dont look back in your life with regret - tell him you want to explore other opportunities and he can either come or let you go (but I think you'd prefer he didn't join you).

Make sure his issues don't stop you seeing your friends and fam. I'm suspicious that he's using his mental health as an excuse to control you. Watch to see if you can see a pattern.

Also I agree with other comments, you're probably growing out of this relationship

If he is curtailing your relationship with your family and/or friends then you have a problem.

Or rather, he does.

I had a similar situation and felt the same pangs about 3 years ago.

I told then bf i was moving, he could come if he liked or he could stay.
I moved and have not looked back. He stayed and i dont think he thought i would go through with it.

I met a new boyfriend a year ago, and life continues on. But i would have been so miserable if i had stayed in that situation and wouldnt own my own place (That i bought a year after moving, thinking i would forever be generation rent) and wouldnt of had the adventures ive had with me new job.

Dont be scared, do it.