What are these ducks

[Suddenchangeinsituation]

Name changed for this one.

Something happened with DP this afternoon which is making me think I may start looking for the way out.

I've seen people talk about getting ducks in a row and haven't really taken much notice.

I now ask you what are the ducks that need to be in a row as it maybe my turn.

Finances, childcare, who gets what etc etc.
Figure out what you absolutely need to leave with, or figure out how to ask him to leave.
Getting your ducks in a row is about making the separation as seamless as possible.
Making it easy to extricate yourself from a difficult position.

Finances- get evidence of all assets, bank accounts, property, businesses, pensions, shares, savings etc. Some men will lie on the form E and unless you are seriously rich a forensic accountant won’t be interested or worthwhile. Also think about what you want out of the split, don’t necessarily tell him because some men will do anything to prevent you getting it. If you have children consider maintenance. See a solicitor and good luck

DP or DH?

DP. We aren't married. I think I'm in the better position as it was my house before he came on the mortgage and I got It tied up so I keep my equity. I work full time I can buy him out of his bit and manage on my own at a push. I won't be eligible for any benefits.

We have 2 DD 3 and 5. I do all the drop off and pick ups anyway so that won't change. They have his name. Should I make sure I have the passports? Their bank accounts are in my name so they are safe.

Is this a domestic abuse situation or not?

No domestic abuse. He lost his temper today but not with the kids just with himself after an argument with me. It's the first and only time I have ever seen him loose his temper and I'm not living like this.

Passports essential. Even if you dont plan to take them anywhere abroad in the near future .

Having up to date financial information; pay stubs, mortgage info, account numbers.
Your own and if applicable children’s passports.
Any ID to establish your own residence/phone account.
Dig around MN I’ve seen recent lists.

Is child benefit paid into your bank account? If not change it so it is

It’s the first and only time he’s lost his temper with himself and you’re considering leaving him?

There must be more to this surely

It’s the first and only time he’s lost his temper with himself and you’re considering leaving him?

There must be more to this surely

Has to be. Everyone has bad days... If I left everyone who ever lost their temper I'd have no one at all around me, including myself.