How to disengage in a relationship?

[AvaGrace412]

Splitting is not currently an option so I really need to disengage after a few days of DH being a total arse over Xmas and me realising that he thinks he is in charge of me and can dictate to me.

Has anyone else disengaged in a relationship and how is the best way to do it?

May I ask why splitting is not currently an option?. Financial reasons, the kids for instance, what people may say?. What is preventing you from splitting up altogether currently?. If you can express what the difficulty is you may well find someone who has been through the same type of scenario. Have you in the last month or so sought legal advice re separation and divorce?.

My guess too is that he is like this with you (and in turn the children) day to day as well. If he is this is yet more reason to start the whole process of separation sooner rather than later.

Grey rock. Google it.

But honestly? You need to leave.

Sleep in a separate room/area if possible. Dont cuddle if you have no other option but to sleep together. Don't have sex. Don't speak to him. Leave the room when he enters it. If he speaks to you say, I don't wish to speak to you, leave me alone. Walk away. Don't do his washing or cooking, shopping or anything else for him. Don't pick arguments, especially if there are children involved. Don't slam doors. Don't think about him, go out, enjoy yourself with friends, hobbies, gym etc. If he speaks to you, look at him and think 'fuck you, you bastard' but don't say anything, apart from I don't want to speak to you. Do the broken record thing.