My sisters all have so much help and I have none

[Constantbronchitislaryngitis]

Feel so resentful

My husband works away most of the time
But my sisters both get loads of help from my parents as they live so nearby
I know it’s just geography but years on, I’m starting to resent that no one can ever come and just give me a night away
Does anyone else feel resentful about something like this???
It’s eating me up and it shouldn’t!
Usually I’m fine but today it’s got to me as my husbands just cone back from two weeks away working; my mum in law is really ill and I need to do her shopping as my husbands too tired
But hey I’m not tired working and looking after kids am I?!

Honestly, tell your husband to do his mothers shopping.

Hi op sorry your feeling like this. Have you ever asked for help? I do ask my parents and mil to have my dc every few months so that dh and i can have a night out. They wouldnt offer off their own steam and my thinking is they can always say no.

In the new year why not ask them to do a specific thing or have dc at a specific time to give you a break?

And also echo pp- tell mil to go online shop and tell DH your just not doing it

The lack of support from your H is your primary problem but your resentment is is directed at your parents, why is that?

Have you ever asked your parents to come and help?

Does your husband pull his weight at home with housework and cooking when he's there or does he expect you to do it all? Does he ever look after the DC in the evening to let you have a break?

Yup I feel like this sometimes op. My parents have my sisters kids for all childcare. PIL have dh youngest brothers kids. Nobody ever has my Dd. Ever. I see it as their loss, she's wonderful!

I do resent the lack of relationship she has with them though. More than the help.

I get you. I'm in exactly the same situation. Both my sisters live near our parents and have had and still have SO much help from my parents, babysitting at the drop of a hat including overnight, having meals brought round, going to my parents for meals.

We chose to live much further away. But it was a necessary choice because of childhood abuse which was only directed at me. If I'd had a healthy functional relationship with my parents we wouldn't have moved so far away.

It's a really difficult situation and upsets me a lot.

So even though our circumstances are different, I understand how you feel and unlike PP I don't think the problem is your DH, I can see how your parents' unequal treatment of you and your siblings hurts.

Diuzfp

Why would you expect your parents to do more parenting than your husband?

Tell your DH to do his mums shopping. Please don't be a martyr by doing it.

If your dh works away often can you not move near your parents?

I have the same problem OP, I actually live few doors away from my parents. I'm a single parent I asked recently if they'd have DC as I need a break response was we dont want to be tied, we like our freedom and someday we will do it. They then had a go at me for dare to ask for any help

Telk your husband to sort the shop he can arrange online shop to be delivered to them

If you lived nearer you parents perhaps you would get more help. But I think that is your choice not something to blame your parents.