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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dating advice needed: girl went cold after a month, her ex is around

1 reply

guscan099 · 20/12/2019 14:11

I have been seeing this girl for around a month until she suddenly switched to being cold and started avoiding to going out with me. I kept calm and patient and we still hold the conversation, and we ended up meeting last week (after not seeing her for a couple of weeks). We had drinks and talked for many hours, and she was saying her ex moved to the town (she thinks it is for her) and even though she doesn't want to be back with him, they started seeing each other and she now feels confused. We kept talking that night and I really feel a connection with this girl.

We are both going away for xmas break, and I left her that night telling her to contact me once she makes up her mind and wants to hang out again. She told me that she will see me in January. Our texting rate slowed down now but she seems to become more responsive and flirty when we text (she even makes plans which is super confusing).

I am kind of worried that she will be back to her ex even after the holidays and don't want to be emotionally invested too much and get heart broken. I also feel bad that she stopped seeing me for weeks just because of her ex is around. But I also have a feeling that I might have a chance with her, and I do really want to see her again.

Should I try to stay in touch with her and ask her out once we are back? Or should I lightly stay in touch (merry xmas etc) and wait for her to contact me in Jan.

OP posts:
rvby · 20/12/2019 14:29

Leave it and move on.

I appreciate you want something to happen here, but you wanting it won't change how she clearly feels. If she wanted something to happen between you, she'd be keen and clear about it.

Leave it, distract yourself, keep busy and meet new people.

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