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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Not sure what to do

8 replies

Dazedandconfused10 · 15/12/2019 20:44

Things with DH have been a bit strained recently. It came to head last night where splitting up came up in discussion.

We have had some ups and downs over the years and things were going really well but I'm feeling a bit taken forgranted with his lack of interest in helping around the house. He's always out every weekend and doesn't seem to want to stay in with me and when he is at home he falls asleep on the sofa early every night.

I love him but I don't know if we have reached the end of the line. He's got a lot of stuff on his plate with family which I'm aware of but when I ask him how he is doing he says he's fine, but I have been in his shoes and so I don't know if that's true.

I know you can't tell me what to do but I don't have anyone to talk this through with so I just need a place to get my thoughts together.

OP posts:
PositiveVibez · 15/12/2019 20:46

What do you actually love about him?

Dazedandconfused10 · 15/12/2019 20:50

He's kind, genuinely nice to me, we get on great 90% of the time, same taste in hobbies, music, tv, he's genuinely my best friend.

OP posts:
Dazedandconfused10 · 15/12/2019 23:45

Nebermind. He made the decision. Oh well.

OP posts:
KellyHall · 15/12/2019 23:49

Sometimes the best thing someone can do for you is set you free.
When I was in your position, I made a list of all the things I'd wanted us to do while I'd been waiting for him to want to spend time with me. Then I did all of those things, by myself. I had an awesome time!
You'll be fine, in time Flowers

SnowyUnicorns · 15/12/2019 23:51

Sorry OP. Sounds suspiciously like he has an OW and he checked out of your marriage a while ago Flowers

Dazedandconfused10 · 16/12/2019 07:18

Thanks guys. There is no other woman I am sure of that, he just doesn't think it's worth trying to save us. Which I understand, I'm devasted and have even more reason to desperately hate this time of year now!

OP posts:
dottydolly72 · 16/12/2019 07:21

In a similar situation currently. Hugs xx

Dazedandconfused10 · 16/12/2019 12:53

Xx
I have messaged him saying I'm willing to do what it takes to make us work. So it's down to him. He's not responded. Not sure if he will.

I know I'll be fine without him (although single for ever!) I'd rather him by my side though.

OP posts:
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