DH and I both early 30s
Married 2 years, together 7
One DC who is 3 months old
In April when I was 17 weeks pregnant DH told me he wasn’t happy, thinks it was a mistake getting married, didn’t love me or think he’d ever loved me, had never really wanted to show me affection and felt awkward when I touched him.
He admitted there was a woman at work who he liked but said this was separate and nothing had happened with them, just that it had made him feel even more unhappy with me as he felt like there was someone he wanted to show affection to and it made him think he should feel like that about me but didn’t.
He ended up staying and we worked on things and some things did improve. When DC was born he told me he was happy and that he loved me.
The last couple of months everything has really been playing on my mind.
DH really has never shown me much affection. Never holds my hand, cuddles me, spoons me, kisses me, even touches me at all out of affection, only if I do so first. He never has and he knows this is something I want and need. He never really initiates sex unless he’s had a few drinks and it’s always me that initiates first. Often he will decline, stating he is tired etc. Even since having baby I have tried to initiate but he has declined each time.
I cant shake this feeling that us trying to make things work was not the right thing to do. I feel terribly lonely and it’s playing on my mind all the time. I’m terrified of being a single mother and worried about what the future would be like, especially as my baby is so young at the moment.
However if things carry on then I feel like both of us are going to be miserable and one of us will end up cheating.
Any advice on what to do or anyone been in similar circumstances?