Do these seem like red flags ?

[Pearlxox]

I've been on 4 dates with a guy I met on Hinge. First 3 dates were in public places, 4th was at his.

I was telling him about some music concerts i'd been to and he seemed really shocked and said he 'couldn't imagine me' listening to that sort of music and was 'really surprised'. (rap and hip hop).

I'm also fairly introverted by nature but I am still sociable and chatty, and stand up for myself. I work in a school and he told me he 'couldn't imagine me' telling a child off or getting annoyed.

Just seemed like he's making all these assumptions about me which was a bit annoying.

We slept together and I noticed he kept 'forgetting' to use condoms. Fair enough when I was asking him to he did but he didn't do it himself unless I asked him (a few times).

Do these sound like red flags or am I just massively picky ? 😂

Both of those things are unpleasant and unacceptable in different ways and both on their own would be enough to end this thing.

The condoms thing is a definite red flag.

I have yet to read a thread here asking if something is a red flag in a relationship where the answer is no.

I think the condom thing is a bit rapey- even if you don't explicitly ask him to every time, he knows you want him to use them.

His 'assumptions' about you I think he sees as compliments- he doesn't see you as the type to like aggressive music, or to be irritable or disciplinarian (though it's your job.)

It's up to you how important you see these things as part of your personality, or how you don't see them as bad things, and might want to tell him why.

IMO he just means he thinks you're a nice person. He probably thinks that because most people are at pains to portray themselves as fairly nice when they first get to know someone, so a lot of the time you might be showing your (conventionally speaking) 'best' side.

Yeah maybe I was taking the comment stuff badly (I do have a tendancy to take things badly even if they aren't meant to be !).
But based on the other thing, I won't see him again.

Good plan xxx

The condom thing is a reason not to see him again. Yes I know most men don’t like them but decent men would not act like this.
The assumptions thing though, while less serious, would REALLY annoy me. I’ve had people say stuff like this and it makes me very annoyed! So another reason it’s a good decision to not see him again.

Not using condoms until you asked him a few times is definitely not on.
The comments are iffy.
I would not date him again

Goodbye to this dude