A friend of mine has recently broken up with her ex of many years. She was heartbroken as it ended extremely badly, cheating, lying, gaslighting and some emotional abuse. I can’t believe he treated her like this either and really feel for her.
She has been online dating since it ended, about 2 months ago, and she very quickly got chatting to someone new. I thought it was too early and told her to hold her hourses but she was very keen to move on and said she needs to have some fun. I could see her point but thought it was too quick.
Well this new guy sounds absolutely terrible. The first time she met him she went around to his house! Thy had a few drinks together and a bit of a laugh but she came away thinking that he was a bit weird and unstable but fancied him a bit. Apparently his house was a right state and he was pretty scruffy himself, he doesn’t work and hasn’t for years, has mental health problems and smokes weed all day. He is in his mid 30s. She is a completely normal, lovely, clever, funny hardworking woman who generally has her shit together so we kind of laughed about it and she said it was a mistake and they clearly weren’t matched.
Unfortunately and unbeknownst to me she has been continuing to go around to his house and now is sleeping with him about once a week. Apparently he does have some serious mental health problems (depression, anxiety and possible mood disorder) and this is why he is signed of work sick. She thinks he has anger issues and he has got very angry with her over tiny things already and ‘made her feel scared’ by shouting at her. Most worryingly of all, he was accused of rape a few years ago by an ex girlfriend. I know it doesn’t mean that he did it as he wasn’t convicted but you have to wonder! My friend even said she thinks it’s probable that he DID do it as she feels he is quite ‘aggressive’ sexually 🤢😵
What the hell is my friend thinking? I am worried for her and have told her as much but she won’t listen. She said that she doesn’t know herself why she keeps seeing him but she does want too for a bit. She mostly enjoys the sex apparently but says that she would be ‘embarrassed’ to have a relationship with him and doesn’t like him like that.
I mean we have all been on he rebound but this is rediculous. She honestly used to be a well grounded and sensible person, she still is in many ways apart from this.
What can I say to her? Why so she doesn’t this? She could do so much better.